Chuck Norris Action Jeans

Submit your best Chuck Norris Action Jeans Fact in the comments below.

{ 50 comments… read them below or add one }

Torch02 February 6, 2012 at 12:34 pm

Chuck Norris puts his Action Jeans on two legs at a time!

Paul Yates February 6, 2012 at 12:35 pm

Chuck Norris Action Jeans….Guaranteed to get you more action!
Hi-Lift Chuck Norris Action Cowboy Boots Not Included!
Jackie Chan’s Tuxedo in “The Tuxedo” was made by the same company that made Chuck Norris Action Jeans!

Brady J. Frey February 6, 2012 at 12:41 pm

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear jeans. They wear him.

Average lifespan of Chuck Norris Action Jeans. 5 seconds.

Sam Singletary February 6, 2012 at 12:48 pm

Chuck Norris Action Jeans don’t shrink the dryer, your leg muscles just get bigger.

Kyle February 6, 2012 at 1:04 pm

Chuck Norris Action Jeans… Engineered to destroy.

Michael February 6, 2012 at 1:26 pm

Action jeans were accidentally created when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a bale of cotton after drinking a handle of bourbon.

Michael Dean February 6, 2012 at 1:38 pm

In the beginning, Chuck Norris put on his Action Jeans.

Eric February 6, 2012 at 1:53 pm

Chuck Norris Action Jeans: They’ll rip you a new one.

Chuck Norris Action Jeans: You’ll fade into obscurity before they fade at all.

John February 6, 2012 at 3:19 pm

Chuck Norris Action Jeans: They’re made of denim!

Rob February 6, 2012 at 5:42 pm

Warning: Action Jeans may cause un-wanted pregnancies. Effective radius is 10 miles.

Justin February 7, 2012 at 12:06 am

If your Chuck Norris action means are feeling a little tight, don’t worry. They didn’t shrink. Your testicles just got bigger.

John February 7, 2012 at 12:29 am

If Chuck Norris Action Jeans are chafing you, it means you’re on the receiving end of a roundhouse kick.

Chuck Norris Action Jeans: Beard not included.

Greg M February 7, 2012 at 2:54 am

You never have to wash Chuck Norris Action Jeans because dirt is too afraid.

js February 7, 2012 at 7:59 am

Looking Good!
Great Price!



js February 7, 2012 at 8:01 am

Looking Good!

Great Price!

Jason February 7, 2012 at 10:03 am

Action Jeans have been know to kill wearers who were unworthy.

Tom February 9, 2012 at 8:01 am

Stopping gay marriage and those damn evolutionists since 1940.

James P February 10, 2012 at 6:34 pm

Chuck Norris Action Jeans have only one action = kill

John W. February 11, 2012 at 6:52 pm

You must register as a lethal weapon after purchasing these jeans. (“Chuck Norris Action Jeans” sound so much cooler than “Duluth Ballroom Jeans”, just google it -they’re the same thing for about $40.00)

Ryan S. February 11, 2012 at 11:22 pm

Chuck Norris Action Jeans: You’ll rip before they do

Super_Dork_42 February 14, 2012 at 12:43 am

A dude once bought Chuck Norris Action Jeans for himself and went out skateboarding. at one point, he had to climb a fence to get to his favorite skate spot. Once he got the second leg over, he suddenly lost his grip and fell. He felt a lot of pain, but as he surveyed the damage, he didn’t even see a scratch on the jeans. When He got home and took off the jeans to shower, he saw a big bloody scrape on his leg where he had fallen. The jeans were apparently so tough, they scraped him instead of allowing the sidewalk to.

True story.

Hugh Jassle March 13, 2012 at 12:14 am

Because of Chucks 3 penis’, his Action Jeans fit like a glove…

LoneStarRussian June 30, 2012 at 2:15 am

Warning: wearing these jeans at an airport security check point will cause the metal detector to go off…because now you have brass balls!

Chuck Norris action jeans are so manly that even Jack Bouer can’t wear them.

Magnus October 15, 2012 at 11:04 am

You can not fold Chuck Norris action jeans, just lean them to the wall

Lars October 15, 2012 at 11:06 am

Chuck Norris action jeans will consume other jeans in your drawer

Simon October 15, 2012 at 11:13 am

Women will go blind if they stare at a man’s butt in Chuck Norris Action Jeans

Luke October 15, 2012 at 11:15 am

Justin Bieber will die if he wears Chuck Norris Action Jeans

Kathy December 21, 2012 at 9:12 pm

Never work as a carpenter in Chuck Norris jeans…
if you pick up a stud-finder it will go crazy!

big D February 6, 2013 at 11:11 am

Chuck Norris puts his action jeans on three legs at a time

Michael May 9, 2013 at 6:40 am

Chuck Norris Action Jeans … you will rip your underwear before you rip these jeans

Fred Nicolas August 6, 2013 at 11:29 pm

The zipper doesnt say “YKK” it says “‘MURICA!”

Willy February 13, 2014 at 10:30 pm

there is a pair of these listed for sale on ebay right now

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paulgarmanjr May 14, 2015 at 9:52 pm

Are these jeans still being sold? Need information if they are

Nat June 9, 2015 at 12:43 pm

*Notice: Not for sale to minors. Proof of Fourth Dan Black Belt, documented victory in worldwide kumite, and a signed waiver of liability required for purchase. Purchaser assumes all responsibility for the use of this item. Your results may vary. Coolness not guaranteed. Not legal in some states. State laws may apply.

Michael October 5, 2015 at 10:41 am

Wearing Action Jeans may result in uncontrollable chest hair growth and dead ninjas.

Chuck Norris January 5, 2017 at 2:10 pm

I made these jeans, they make y’all thicc with 2 c’s. 10/10 IGN pls buy my jeans my meme money ran out. I’m a dead meme.

Chipotle January 5, 2017 at 2:11 pm

These work wonders on the midget thighs, they really pop out with THICCNESSSSSSSS, buy them you won’t regret the savior bulge these give you

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