November 10, 2010

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The 12 Most Infamous Mustaches of All Time

As many of you know, AoM is taking part in the Movember contest to raise money and awareness for prostate cancer. Our team has over 300 fearless members who will be growing mustaches and raising money during the month of November. One week into the contest and the AoM Team has already raised over $13,000 to fight prostate cancer! Bam!

Last year when we kicked off Movember we created a list of the manliest mustaches of all time. Great men like Teddy Roosevelt and Martin Luther King, Jr. made the list as well as a few funny and bad dudes from history and fiction. This year we thought it would be interesting to create a list of the most infamous mustaches of all time. These mustaches have a reputation of the worst kind because of the actions and character of their wearers. These mustaches, stroked and twirled by their owners as they plotted their evil plans, were accomplices to some of the most dastardly deeds in fictional and real history.

Joseph Stalin

joseph stalin portrait mustache military dress uniform

In Soviet Russia, mustache wears you.

Genghis Khan

ghengis khan drawing illustration mustache military uniform

The tales of Genghis Khan’s brutality in conquest are surely exaggerated. He had only to show people his mustache and they would surrender on the spot.

Captain Hook

captain hook pencil mustache cartoon screenshot

All of Captain Hook’s anger can be traced to the fact that he felt suffocated as a pirate when his true dream was to become an artist just like his hero and mustache muse, Salvador Dali.

Vlad the Impaler

vlad the impaler painting mustache long hair

Before vampires made tween girls swoon with their bare-chested, fresh-faced charms, they wore mustaches and impaled people on sharpened sticks. “Team Vlad” t-shirts have surprisingly not sold well in stores.

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Saddam Hussein

saddam hussein military uniform hat gun mustache

According to a leaked CIA memo, Iraq’s WMDs were hidden in Saddam Hussein’s lush Arabian mustache.

The Godfather

don corleone godfather marlon brando mustache

Don Corleone’s mustache will make you an offer you can’t refuse.

Snidely Whiplash

snidely whiplash cartoon sinister mustache

Snidely Whiplash spent his career trolling around Canada abducting young women and tying them to railroad tracks. His numerous murder attempts were finally ended, not by Dudley Do-Right, but by an angry damsel who fought back by wrapping his mustache around his neck and choking him with it.

Adolf Hitler

adolf hitler portrait head shot infamous mustache

The most infamous mustache of all time. Hitler changed history in numerous ways, including making this style of mustache (not to mention the name Adolf) verboten forever more.

Boris Badenov

boris badenov cartoon infamous mustache

A product of the same School of Villainry as Snidely Whiplash (Step 1: Grow mustache. Step 2: Clasp hands together menacingly in front of you), Boris Badenov lived a life of terrible frustration. Not only were his evil plots consistently foiled by a squirrel and a moose, he could never get Natasha Fatale to see him as more than a partner in crime, despite his debonair, “bad enough” mustache. Perhaps because she was seemingly a full six feet taller than him.

Bill the Butcher

bill the butcher gangs new york head shot mustache

We “Know-Nothing” about Bill the Butcher’s stache except that it died a true American when its owner expired.

Dick Dastardly

dick dastardly cartoon infamous pencil mustache

In his attempts to stop his racing opponents through cheating, this “double-dealing do-badder” deployed a variety of traps from his race car, the Mean Machine. But none were as effective as a nozzle that dispensed mustache wax onto the road.

Augusto Pinochet

Augusto Pinochet military uniform sunglasses mustache

Augusto Pinochet’s mustache took over his upper lip through an oppressive military coup.

READ
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What are some other infamous mustaches from history and fiction? Add to our list in the comments!


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