{"id":143634,"date":"2021-10-29T08:52:46","date_gmt":"2021-10-29T13:52:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/?p=143634"},"modified":"2022-12-15T11:44:04","modified_gmt":"2022-12-15T17:44:04","slug":"what-to-do-if-you-get-kicked-in-the-nards","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/health-fitness\/health\/what-to-do-if-you-get-kicked-in-the-nards\/","title":{"rendered":"What to Do If You Get Kicked in the Nards"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-143647\" src=\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Nards-1-1.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"750\" height=\"1297\" srcset=\"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Nards-1-1.jpg 750w, https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Nards-1-1-320x553.jpg 320w, https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Nards-1-1-640x1107.jpg 640w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 750px) 100vw, 750px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>One of the downsides of being a man is that our reproductive organs, i.e., our nards, hang outside of our bodies, leaving them vulnerable to impact. When your nards take a hit, it hurts. A lot. You may even feel sick to your stomach after a particularly severe blow.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>No man, or part-canine\/part-man, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=BX6KrC-PHcQ\">knows the pain of getting hit in the nards quite like Wolfman<\/a> \u2014 a character from the 1987 cinematic masterpiece, <em><a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/3pL9mmM\">Monster Squad<\/a>.&nbsp;<\/em><\/p>\n<p>In the illustrated guide above, Wolfman shows you what to do if you suffer a similar fate and get kicked in the nards. Let&#8217;s review and unpack these recommendations:&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Lie down and rest.&nbsp;<\/strong>Your first line of treatment is to simply lie down and rest. Usually the pain of getting hit in the testicles will subside in about 15 minutes. Growing up, I remember being told to lie down on your back and bring your knees to your chest, but my research in nard-directed first aid didn&#8217;t bring up that suggestion. Rest is the key.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Apply an ice pack.&nbsp;<\/strong>If your nards are still hurting after your initial 15-minute recovery period, consider applying an ice pack to reduce inflammation. You don&#8217;t want to apply the cold compress directly to the skin of your nards; make sure there&#8217;s a barrier in between. Play some <em>Pitfall!<\/em> with your mummy pal.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Take an ibuprofen.&nbsp;<\/strong>Ask your mad-scientist-created, neck-bolted pal for some Advil to help reduce pain and inflammation.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><strong>If the pain doesn&#8217;t go away in an hour, go to the doctor.&nbsp;<\/strong>If the pain doesn&#8217;t subside within 60 minutes, seek medical attention. You may have damaged your testicles and will need surgery to repair and save them.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>There you go. What to do if you get kicked in the nards. To avoid this fate befalling you, don&#8217;t chase kids around when you turn into a werewolf. Also, <a href=\"https:\/\/youtu.be\/Qy3qk4ohwFA?t=13\">avoid hanging out with Bobby Hill<\/a>.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><em>Rad illustration by <a href=\"https:\/\/storytellersworkshop.com\/\">Ted Slampyak<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>One of the downsides of being a man is that our reproductive organs, i.e., our nards, hang outside of our bodies, leaving them vulnerable to impact. When your nards take a hit, it hurts. A lot. You may even feel sick to your stomach after a particularly severe blow.&nbsp; No man, or part-canine\/part-man, knows the [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":143648,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"activitypub_content_warning":"","activitypub_content_visibility":"","activitypub_max_image_attachments":3,"activitypub_interaction_policy_quote":"anyone","activitypub_status":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[6,42265,7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-143634","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-featured","category-health","category-health-fitness"],"featured_image_urls":{"aom":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2021\/10\/wolf-feat-349x230.jpg","reactor-320":"https:\/\/content.artofmanliness.com\/uploads\/2021\/10\/wolf-feat-320x229.jpg"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.4 (Yoast SEO v27.4) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>What to Do If You Get Kicked in the Nards | The Art of Manliness<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/health-fitness\/health\/what-to-do-if-you-get-kicked-in-the-nards\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"What to Do If You Get Kicked in the Nards | The Art of Manliness\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"One of the downsides of being a man is that our reproductive organs, i.e., our nards, hang outside of our bodies, leaving them vulnerable to impact. 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