{"id":105302,"date":"2019-07-08T12:49:53","date_gmt":"2019-07-08T17:49:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/?p=105302"},"modified":"2026-09-24T20:09:08","modified_gmt":"2026-09-25T01:09:08","slug":"keep-your-relationship-happy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/","title":{"rendered":"Podcast #523: How to Keep a Happy Relationship Happy"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Most marriage and relationship advice books focus on solving problems.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But my guests today argue that we shouldn&#8217;t wait until problems arise in our relationship to work on strengthening it. Instead, they say, when times are good, we should think about how to keep that good, and act to make it even better.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Their names are <a href=\"https:\/\/www.buildhappytogether.com\/\">James&nbsp;Pawelski and&nbsp;Suzann Pileggi Pawelski<\/a>, and they&#8217;re husband and wife.&nbsp;James has a background in philosophy, and they both have backgrounds in psychology. They combined insights from both fields to write&nbsp;the book&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.amazon.com\/gp\/product\/0143130595\/ref=as_li_tl?ie=UTF8&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=390957&amp;creativeASIN=0143130595&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;tag=stucosuccess&amp;linkId=FSXA3GZUT5SFDAZ4\"><em>Happy Together:&nbsp;Using the Science of Positive Psychology to Build Love That Lasts<\/em><\/a>. We begin our conversation discussing how most relationship advice falls short, the biggest myths people have about relationships, and the contrast between Plato&#8217;s and Aristotle&#8217;s approach to relationships. We then dig into the role emotions play in a relationship, particularly&nbsp;passion, and what we can do to continue to cultivate and experience positive emotions in a marriage even after being together for years. We then dig into how our character influences our relationships and how our relationships influence our character. James and Suzann share insights on how and why to focus on our strengths, help our partners develop their strengths, and even go on a &#8220;strengths date&#8221; together. We end our conversation talking about the power of appreciation in relationships.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Most marriage and relationship advice books focus on solving problems.&nbsp; But my guests today argue that we shouldn&#8217;t wait until problems arise in our relationship to work on strengthening it. Instead, they say, when times are good, we should think about how to keep that good, and act to make it even better.&nbsp; Their names [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":195311,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[42398,156,42379],"tags":[42291],"class_list":["post-105302","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-marriage","category-podcast","category-social","tag-marriage"],"featured_image_urls":{"large":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/523-538x280.png","medium_large":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/523-768x432.png","aom":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/523-372x230.png","reactor-320":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/523-320x180.png","reactor-640":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/523-640x360.png"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v28.4 (Yoast SEO v28.4) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>How to Keep Your Romantic Relationship Happy | Art of Manliness<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Most relationship books focus on solving problems.\u00a0But we shouldn&#039;t wait until problems arise in our relationship to work on strengthening it.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Podcast #523: How to Keep a Happy Relationship Happy | The Art of Manliness\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Most relationship books focus on solving problems.\u00a0But we shouldn&#039;t wait until problems arise in our relationship to work on strengthening it.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"The Art of Manliness\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"http:\/\/facebook.com\/artofmanliness\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-07-08T17:49:53+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2026-09-25T01:09:08+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/523.png\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1280\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"720\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Brett\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@artofmanliness\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@artofmanliness\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Brett\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/marriage\\\/keep-your-relationship-happy\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/marriage\\\/keep-your-relationship-happy\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Brett\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/84a51044fb965564cde35d18f7e0a832\"},\"headline\":\"Podcast #523: How to Keep a Happy Relationship Happy\",\"datePublished\":\"2019-07-08T17:49:53+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-09-25T01:09:08+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/marriage\\\/keep-your-relationship-happy\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":244,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/marriage\\\/keep-your-relationship-happy\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2019\\\/07\\\/523.png\",\"keywords\":[\"Marriage\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Marriage\",\"Podcast\",\"Social\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"copyrightYear\":\"2019\",\"copyrightHolder\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/#organization\"}},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/marriage\\\/keep-your-relationship-happy\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/marriage\\\/keep-your-relationship-happy\\\/\",\"name\":\"How to Keep Your Romantic Relationship Happy | Art of Manliness\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/marriage\\\/keep-your-relationship-happy\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/marriage\\\/keep-your-relationship-happy\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2019\\\/07\\\/523.png\",\"datePublished\":\"2019-07-08T17:49:53+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2026-09-25T01:09:08+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/84a51044fb965564cde35d18f7e0a832\"},\"description\":\"Most relationship books focus on solving problems.\u00a0But we shouldn't wait until problems arise in our relationship to work on strengthening it.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/marriage\\\/keep-your-relationship-happy\\\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/marriage\\\/keep-your-relationship-happy\\\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/marriage\\\/keep-your-relationship-happy\\\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2019\\\/07\\\/523.png\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2019\\\/07\\\/523.png\",\"width\":1280,\"height\":720},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/social\\\/marriage\\\/keep-your-relationship-happy\\\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Podcast #523: How to Keep a Happy Relationship Happy\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/\",\"name\":\"The Art of Manliness\",\"description\":\"Men&#039;s Interest and Lifestyle\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/84a51044fb965564cde35d18f7e0a832\",\"name\":\"Brett\",\"sameAs\":[\"http:\\\/\\\/artofmanliness.com\"],\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.artofmanliness.com\\\/author\\\/brett\\\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO Premium plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"How to Keep Your Romantic Relationship Happy | Art of Manliness","description":"Most relationship books focus on solving problems.\u00a0But we shouldn't wait until problems arise in our relationship to work on strengthening it.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Podcast #523: How to Keep a Happy Relationship Happy | The Art of Manliness","og_description":"Most relationship books focus on solving problems.\u00a0But we shouldn't wait until problems arise in our relationship to work on strengthening it.","og_url":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/","og_site_name":"The Art of Manliness","article_publisher":"http:\/\/facebook.com\/artofmanliness","article_published_time":"2019-07-08T17:49:53+00:00","article_modified_time":"2026-09-25T01:09:08+00:00","og_image":[{"width":1280,"height":720,"url":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/523.png","type":"image\/png"}],"author":"Brett","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@artofmanliness","twitter_site":"@artofmanliness","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Brett","Est. reading time":"2 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/"},"author":{"name":"Brett","@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/#\/schema\/person\/84a51044fb965564cde35d18f7e0a832"},"headline":"Podcast #523: How to Keep a Happy Relationship Happy","datePublished":"2019-07-08T17:49:53+00:00","dateModified":"2026-09-25T01:09:08+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/"},"wordCount":244,"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/523.png","keywords":["Marriage"],"articleSection":["Marriage","Podcast","Social"],"inLanguage":"en-US","copyrightYear":"2019","copyrightHolder":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/#organization"}},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/","url":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/","name":"How to Keep Your Romantic Relationship Happy | Art of Manliness","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/523.png","datePublished":"2019-07-08T17:49:53+00:00","dateModified":"2026-09-25T01:09:08+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/#\/schema\/person\/84a51044fb965564cde35d18f7e0a832"},"description":"Most relationship books focus on solving problems.\u00a0But we shouldn't wait until problems arise in our relationship to work on strengthening it.","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/523.png","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/523.png","width":1280,"height":720},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/social\/marriage\/keep-your-relationship-happy\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Podcast #523: How to Keep a Happy Relationship Happy"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/","name":"The Art of Manliness","description":"Men&#039;s Interest and Lifestyle","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/#\/schema\/person\/84a51044fb965564cde35d18f7e0a832","name":"Brett","sameAs":["http:\/\/artofmanliness.com"],"url":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/author\/brett\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/105302","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=105302"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/105302\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/195311"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=105302"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=105302"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.artofmanliness.com\/app-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=105302"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}