The Art of Manliness

37 Conversation Rules for Gentlemen from 1875

Brett & Kate McKay — Wed, 19 Jun 2013 22:52:45 +0000

Editor’s note: The excerpt below comes from a book published in 1875: A Gentleman’s Guide to Etiquette by Cecil B. Hartley. Hartley’s rules may be over 100 years old, but they’re just as true today as they ever were. There are some real gems here — some of which truly gave me a chuckle.

1. Even if convinced that your opponent is utterly wrong, yield gracefully, decline further discussion, or dexterously turn the conversation, but do not obstinately defend your own opinion until you become angry…Many there are who, giving their opinion, not as an opinion but as a law, will defend their position by such phrases, as: “Well, if I were president, or governor, I would,” — and while by the warmth of their argument they prove that they are utterly unable to govern their own temper, they will endeavor to persuade you that they are perfectly competent to take charge of the government of the nation.

2. Retain, if you will, a fixed political opinion, yet do not parade it upon all occasions, and, above all, do not endeavor to force others to agree with you. Listen calmly to their ideas upon the same subjects, and if you cannot agree, differ politely, and while your opponent may set you down as a bad politician, let him be obliged to admit that you are a gentleman.

3. Never interrupt anyone who is speaking; it is quite rude to officiously supply a name or date about which another hesitates, unless you are asked to do so. Another gross breach of etiquette is to anticipate the point of a story which another person is reciting, or to take it from his lips to finish it in your own language. Some persons plead as an excuse for this breach of etiquette, that the reciter was spoiling a good story by a bad manner, but this does not mend the matter. It is surely rude to give a man to understand that you do not consider him capable of finishing an anecdote that he has commenced.

4. It is ill-bred to put on an air of weariness during a long speech from another person, and quite as rude to look at a watch, read a letter, flirt the leaves of a book, or in any other action show that you are tired of the speaker or his subject.

5. In a general conversation, never speak when another person is speaking, and never try by raising your own voice to drown that of another. Never assume an air of haughtiness, or speak in a dictatorial manner; let your conversation be always amiable and frank, free from every affectation.

6. Never, unless you are requested to do so, speak of your own business or profession in society; to confine your conversation entirely to the subject or pursuit which is your own specialty is low-bred and vulgar. Make the subject for conversation suit the company in which you are placed. Joyous, light conversation will be at times as much out of place as a sermon would be at a dancing party. Let your conversation be grave or gay as suits the time or place.

7. In a dispute, if you cannot reconcile the parties, withdraw from them. You will surely make one enemy, perhaps two, by taking either side, in an argument when the speakers have lost their temper.

8. Never, during a general conversation, endeavor to concentrate the attention wholly upon yourself. It is quite as rude to enter into conversation with one of a group, and endeavor to draw him out of the circle of general conversation to talk with you alone.

9. A man of real intelligence and cultivated mind is generally modest. He may feel when in everyday society, that in intellectual acquirements he is above those around him; but he will not seek to make his companions feel their inferiority, nor try to display this advantage over them. He will discuss with frank simplicity the topics started by others, and endeavor to avoid starting such as they will not feel inclined to discuss. All that he says will be marked by politeness and deference to the feelings and opinions of others.

10. It is as great an accomplishment to listen with an air of interest and attention, as it is to speak well. To be a good listener is as indispensable as to be a good talker, and it is in the character of listener that you can most readily detect the man who is accustomed to good society.

11. Never listen to the conversation of two persons who have thus withdrawn from a group. If they are so near you that you cannot avoid hearing them, you may, with perfect propriety, change your seat.

12. Make your own share in conversation as modest and brief as is consistent with the subject under consideration, and avoid long speeches and tedious stories. If, however, another, particularly an old man, tells a long story, or one that is not new to you, listen respectfully until he has finished, before you speak again.

13. Speak of yourself but little. Your friends will find out your virtues without forcing you to tell them, and you may feel confident that it is equally unnecessary to expose your faults yourself.

14. If you submit to flattery, you must also submit to the imputation of folly and self-conceit.

15. In speaking of your friends, do not compare them, one with another. Speak of the merits of each one, but do not try to heighten the virtues of one by contrasting them with the vices of another.

16. Avoid, in conversation all subjects which can injure the absent. A gentleman will never calumniate or listen to calumny.

17. The wittiest man becomes tedious and ill-bred when he endeavors to engross entirely the attention of the company in which he should take a more modest part.

18. Avoid set phrases, and use quotations but rarely. They sometimes make a very piquant addition to conversation, but when they become a constant habit, they are exceedingly tedious, and in bad taste.

19. Avoid pedantry; it is a mark, not of intelligence, but stupidity.

20. Speak your own language correctly; at the same time do not be too great a stickler for formal correctness of phrases.

21. Never notice it if others make mistakes in language. To notice by word or look such errors in those around you is excessively ill-bred.

22. If you are a professional or scientific man, avoid the use of technical terms. They are in bad taste, because many will not understand them. If, however, you unconsciously use such a term or phrase, do not then commit the still greater error of explaining its meaning. No one will thank you for thus implying their ignorance.

23. In conversing with a foreigner who speaks imperfect English, listen with strict attention, yet do not supply a word, or phrase, if he hesitates. Above all, do not by a word or gesture show impatience if he makes pauses or blunders. If you understand his language, say so when you first speak to him; this is not making a display of your own knowledge, but is a kindness, as a foreigner will be pleased to hear and speak his own language when in a strange country.

24. Be careful in society never to play the part of buffoon, for you will soon become known as the “funny” man of the party, and no character is so perilous to your dignity as a gentleman. You lay yourself open to both censure and bad ridicule, and you may feel sure that, for every person who laughs with you, two are laughing at you, and for one who admires you, two will watch your antics with secret contempt.

25. Avoid boasting. To speak of your money, connections, or the luxuries at your command is in very bad taste. It is quite as ill-bred to boast of your intimacy with distinguished people. If their names occur naturally in the course of conversation, it is very well; but to be constantly quoting, “my friend, Gov. C,” or, “my intimate friend, the president,” is pompous and in bad taste.

26. While refusing the part of jester yourself, do not, by stiff manners, or cold, contemptuous looks, endeavor to check the innocent mirth of others. It is in excessively bad taste to drag in a grave subject of conversation when pleasant, bantering talk is going on around you. Join in pleasantly and forget your graver thoughts for the time, and you will win more popularity than if you chill the merry circle or turn their innocent gayety to grave discussions.

27. When thrown into the society of literary people, do not question them about their works. To speak in terms of admiration of any work to the author is in bad taste; but you may give pleasure, if, by a quotation from their writings, or a happy reference to them, you prove that you have read and appreciated them.

28. It is extremely rude and pedantic, when engaged in general conversation, to make quotations in a foreign language.

29. To use phrases which admit of a double meaning, is ungentlemanly.

30. If you find you are becoming angry in a conversation, either turn to another subject or keep silence. You may utter, in the heat of passion, words which you would never use in a calmer moment, and which you would bitterly repent when they were once said.

31. “Never talk of ropes to a man whose father was hanged” is a vulgar but popular proverb. Avoid carefully subjects which may be construed into personalities, and keep a strict reserve upon family matters. Avoid, if you can, seeing the skeleton in your friend’s closet, but if it is paraded for your special benefit, regard it as a sacred confidence, and never betray your knowledge to a third party.

32. If you have traveled, although you will endeavor to improve your mind in such travel, do not be constantly speaking of your journeyings. Nothing is more tiresome than a man who commences every phrase with, “When I was in Paris,” or, “In Italy I saw…”

33. When asking questions about persons who are not known to you, in a drawing-room, avoid using adjectives; or you may enquire of a mother, “Who is that awkward, ugly girl?” and be answered, “Sir, that is my daughter.”

34. Avoid gossip; in a woman it is detestable, but in a man it is utterly despicable.

35. Do not officiously offer assistance or advice in general society. Nobody will thank you for it.

36. Avoid flattery. A delicate compliment is permissible in conversation, but flattery is broad, coarse, and to sensible people, disgusting. If you flatter your superiors, they will distrust you, thinking you have some selfish end; if you flatter ladies, they will despise you, thinking you have no other conversation.

37. A lady of sense will feel more complimented if you converse with her upon instructive, high subjects, than if you address to her only the language of compliment. In the latter case she will conclude that you consider her incapable of discussing higher subjects, and you cannot expect her to be pleased at being considered merely a silly, vain person, who must be flattered into good humor.

Outfitted & Equipped: Fourth of July Parade

Brett — Wed, 19 Jun 2013 17:02:53 +0000

This post is brought to you by Declaration Clothing. Check out their line of Revolutionary War and WWII-inspired tees. How does Outfitted and Equipped work? The FAQ.

Independence Day is in two weeks. My family has always done the Fourth of July up big with lots of traditions. The day is filled with activities from morning until night; my family loves to cram as much fun as possible into the holiday. The highlight of the day has always been the Fourth of July parade in my hometown of Edmond, OK. The parade hasn’t changed much in 20 years, but I still enjoy going to it year after year. I love the sense of community when I’m standing next to my neighbors cheering on the local Boy Scouts carrying flags or watching a local children’s Tae Kwon Do class demonstrate their board-breaking skills along the parade route.

In today’s edition of Outfitted & Equipped I highlight some of the things I’ll be packing and sporting at this year’s Fourth of July Parade.

1. The Shades. Ray-Ban Wayfarer. Classic, cool, and keeps the summer sun out of your eyes.

2. The Tee. Declaration Clothing Liberty. Style’s not really a priority on the Fourth, at least for me. But one place I suggest a simple upgrade is the t-shirt department. Every year my mom buys us all Old Navy t-shirts with American flags emblazoned on the front. But they’re not very spiffy (sorry mom) and donning a patriotic tee that’s made in China doesn’t exactly say “Happy Independence Day.” Enter the tees from Declaration Clothing. Besides my bros at Tankfarm, these guys make my absolute favorite tees; I’m such a huge fan. They’re all made in the USA and sport interesting, conversation-starting designs that draw on American history and symbolism. Their Liberty tee is perfect for the Fourth. They also make the “Join or Die” t-shirt I sported in the playground workout video that drew a good number of compliments.

3. The Chair. Lawn Chair USA Old Glory. The parade in Edmond can last a good two hours or more, so you’re going to need a place to sit. These patriotic lawn chairs from Lawn Chair USA will do the trick. This American classic is made in Georgia, U.S.A.

4. The Shoes. Sperry Original Boat Shoe. My go-to summertime casual shoe. Here’s how to wear them sockless without stinking up the joint.

5. The Shorts. Old Navy Utility Shorts. Simple, cheap.

6. The Beverage Container. Coleman Steel-Belted Cooler. Even at nine am, the temps on a July morning can be creeping into the 90s here in Oklahoma. A cooler packed with icy beverages is a must.

7. The Beverage. Virgil’s Root Beer. What do I hope to see in that cooler? A frosty bottle of Virgil’s root beer. The hands down winner of the AoM root beer taste test!

8. The Snack. Blueberry Scone. The best part of the parade is quite possibly the bagfuls of blueberry scones my sister whips up. They’re extraordinary. Nothing like munching on a tasty pastry while listening to the float for a local bank blast “I’m Proud To Be An American” from their speakers.

9. The Bottle Opener. Declaration Independence Opener. This handsome bottle opener from Declaration Clothing features a U.S.A. monogram that was engraved on the buttons of Continental Army officers during the Revolutionary War.

10. The Pride. Mini American Flag. Long may she wave! Having a little American flag to wave when the troops march by is essential. The flag’s gotta be made in America of course! America’s oldest flag maker, Annin, has been making American flags domestically since 1847. Their flags have flown at every inauguration since Zachary Taylor’s in 1849, atop Mount Suribachi on Iwo Jima in 1945, and on the moon. They don’t sell online though, unfortunately, so if you have trouble finding one locally, here’s a mini Made in America flag for just a buck.

Tell us about your hometown’s Independence Day parade in the comments!

How to Create a Lifelong Brotherhood

A Manly Guest Contributor — Tue, 18 Jun 2013 23:51:14 +0000

Editor’s Note: This a guest post from Jonathan Mead.

The responses from my closest male friends surprised me when I asked them this question: “What’s the one thing you feel was or is missing that’s held you back from becoming a man?”

I assumed for most men it would be “lack of direction” or “knowing my purpose.” But the common thread in every reply caught me completely off-guard.

Nearly all the responses had to do with a painful absence of brotherhood or mentorship in their lives.

I know that pain deeply.

For at least the last decade, I’ve felt the void of brotherhood and have wondered if I’ll ever have what childhood friends and old men sitting around barbershop stools have.

I’m not talking about just “bros” you shoot the breeze with, but quality, salt-of-the-earth men you know have your back through thick and thin. I’ve felt a pull to build a brotherhood of men I can count on to meet up without hesitance and have real camaraderie with, not just guys that want to get wasted and chase women.

And it’s painfully clear to me that most men are starving for a brotherhood that goes beyond beer slugging and fantasy football.

I got tired of passively complaining and decided to do something about it. You can choose, like I did, to actively create what you want, or wallow in your despair.

But first things first…

The Lost Art of Intentional Brotherhoods

Brotherhood used to be built into tribes and nomadic cultures. Lionel Tiger, who literally wrote the book on male bonding, had this to say: ”Male bonding is a process with biological roots to the establishment of alliances necessary for group defense and hunting.”

The question, then, becomes, have we lost the integral existence of male groups because our modern lives don’t make them a necessity?

Because of their lack of survival obligation, modern brotherhood is becoming more of a lost art relegated to secret societies and dying traditions. The few remaining forms of these brotherhoods are fraternities, Boy Scouts, and church groups. You might also have boyhood friendships that has lasted through adulthood, or built-in brotherhood through close brothers, uncles, or perhaps your father.

That is, if you’re lucky. Not so with me.

I was an only boy of four sisters, so I was out of luck in the “built-in brotherhood” department. And while I loved Boy Scouts, it’s an adventure that ends at adulthood.

If we don’t have brotherhood built-in, perhaps we must create it.

It’s no wonder why movies like Fight Club and 300 are so popular. They stir within us an unquenched desire to belong to our own tribe of men that we can call brothers.

But can we learn to just deal with surface-level interaction and solitude as men? I don’t think so.

There are three reasons we need brotherhoods now more than ever:

Critical Reason #1: We Need Brotherhoods to Become Better Men

Interestingly, men, not women, are the likeliest to form gender-based groups, and have the highest percentage of groups that meet in secret (“secret societies”).

While most of these groups have traditionally had a specific agenda — religious, political, or otherwise — it’s through organized groups that men come together to compete, insult, berate, and grow together.

This is a male-specific form of bonding and growth. Men for thousands of years have come together in intentional groups to sharpen each other in different ways. It’s through challenges from other men that we grow.

Critical Reason #2: Bonding with Other Men Is How We Best Learn

David Deida, author of Way of the Superior Man, eloquently states the defining characteristic of the male sex: “Life as a man is like a constant error correction. Making a mistake, and correcting, then making another mistake and correcting.”

This is distinct from the way women interact and bond with each other. Men tend to be more binary: “This is right and that is wrong, and I learn by discovering what is most right.” Whereas women tend to be more intuitive: “This is how I feel, and I’m going to feel out what I want to do next based on everything I’m taking in.”

As men, we need this kind of feedback and guidance from other men to help us error correct, to help us learn what it means to be a man. We’re not good at feeling our way through it. We need to see “correct” behavior in order to find our own most appropriate path.

Critical Reason #3: Brotherhoods May Be the Antidote for Fatherlessness and Depression

While more women than men attempt suicide overall, men account for 3/4 of all completed suicides. And suicide rates for men overall have been climbing sharply over this past decade; among middle-age men, suicide now accounts for almost 30 out of every 100,000 deaths –3X that of their female peers. Rates of suicide for men in their 50s has increased an astonishing 50%. What accounts for this jump? One of the reasons researchers cite is isolation.

Women are often better at maintaining friendships, seeking out help, and talking about their feelings. Why are men so bad at this? Is it because we’re missing the brotherhood and camaraderie that makes us feel safe to express ourselves as men? Is it the lack of strong male role models that have left us lost in a world where we don’t know how to be strong, sensitive, and courageous men (according to the 2011 US census, 1 out of 3 children grow up in a fatherless home)?

Obviously, we need more men to step up and lead as fathers, but we also need more men to step up and lead other men.

How Brotherhood Finally Helped Me Become a Man

I didn’t feel like I was truly a man until I left my cubicle behind, struck out on my own, and started working for myself. Once my wife and I were 100% reliant on my ability to hustle and make ends meet, I felt like I had gone through a rite of passage that transformed me into a man.

Maybe it was that I felt like I could control the course and direction of my own destiny. I had become truly self-reliant for the first time in my life.

But the reason I was able to succeed was not simply because of my own independent will. It was because I had a brotherhood that was also working to create their own vocations on their own terms. These men helped lift me up, believe in me, and made me stronger than I was standing alone.

And while online connections are great, I realized I was yearning for something offline and more personal. I wanted to be able to call the guys to a pickup game of basketball in the park or go on a hike in the woods without planning it out a month in advance.

I wanted real brotherhood, so I decided to do something about it.

There’s an old saying that goes, “When you’re sick and tired of being sick and tired, you’ll finally do something about it.”

I got sick and tired of complaining about a lack of brotherhood when there were so many awesome men around me.

So I gathered the email addresses of nine local guys and asked them a simple question:

“Would you be interested in meeting up with other awesome men once a month to do cool things?”

The overwhelming response was, “Hell yes.” I guess I wasn’t the only one that needed something like this.

So far we’ve played glow-in-the-dark miniature golf, sat and drank mind-expanding tea (yes, tea can get you high, believe it or not), and have conquered fears together. We use our gatherings as an excuse to bond and do fun, bucket-list type stuff together.

You don’t need blood-brother rituals, matching tattoos, or secret handshakes to create a brotherhood (not that any of those things aren’t cool).

All you need is initiative and the right men.

How to Create Your Own Brotherhood

The first and most critical step is to define your intention and purpose:

What do you want in a brotherhood and why do you want it?
What do you hope to gain from and give to it?
Is your intention to have fun, bond, and do interesting things, or do you care more about having a forum for expressing your challenges and issues as a man to work through them?

Answering these questions will help you get clear on your purpose for the group.

How to find the right men for your brotherhood:

This is probably the hardest part, and why most men will never do the work necessary to create an organized men’s group.

You have a few choices:

Find an existing men’s group or meetup that’s firmly established. If you just want a forum for expressing yourself and exploring your masculinity, this might be the best fit for you. This is the easiest choice if you can find a good group that’s already established.
Create a group locally. This will give you the most intentional control and freedom as you won’t have to work within the bounds of an established group and “fit in” to their intentions. This is a bit harder, but worth it if you want to determine the direction of the group.
Move somewhere where there’s an existing group. This is obviously the most difficult option. However, if you are already looking to move somewhere where there is a culture much more resonant with who you are, this change might be exactly what you need.
Create a group virtually. Obviously, this is the most limited variation, but it might be good enough if you can’t find or create a local group. Instead, you might meet on Skype or Google Hangout.

Recruiting and enlisting the right men:

Who and how you’ll recruit depends on your intention for the group. If you want a group of guys that meets every month as an excuse to go on exciting adventures, you will have different criteria for the men you enlist than if you’re wanting a weekly men’s group that meets to discuss and challenge each other to grow as men.

You don’t have to limit yourself to either of these group types, but deciding your intention for the group will help you identify the right candidates.

Here are some tips I’ve found helpful for finding good men:

Try to look for guys that are interested in personal growth, fitness, and pushing past personal limitations. Where do these men hang out? Conferences, seminars, blogs, forums, and events related to personal growth, of course.
Look for men that you wouldn’t mind hanging out with for an entire weekend. If someone is going to get on your nerves quickly, they’re probably not a great fit.
Determine the size of the group and demographics you want. I find that 6-10 guys is a great size and keeps things fairly simple. Most of the men in our group are in the age range of 25-50. All of us are health-conscious and live active lifestyles so it makes it easy for us to do physical things.
Look within your network first. Approach peers, coworkers, friends, and family that you would love to connect with more deeply. Post something on Facebook telling people you’re considering starting a group and ask for interest. Email the people you’re considering including directly with a casual invitation.
If you’re having trouble enlisting in your established network, utilize tools like Craigslist (in their Strictly Platonic section) and Meetup.com.

Creating the right space and intention:

Our men’s group meets on the last Saturday of every month. Each month we take nominations for what we’re going to do next, and then we vote on what we’ll do.

We use this as an excuse to do adventurous things and conquer personal challenges. Some of them are things that have been on one of our bucket lists for a long time. Some are things one of us has always wanted to learn or try. Sometimes it’s just something random and fun.

If you want to be more formal, you can organize a weekly group with a set agenda. A quick start guide on creating a formal men’s group can be found here.

Next, decide what the rules will be, if any. For our group we have two rules:

It’s not about business. If we didn’t have this rule it would be easy for us to default to conversations and activities centered around work. Since we already do that enough, this rule helps us stay focused on what matters to us: connection beyond work.
If you miss more than two meetups in a row you’ll stop getting invited. We want members that are committed and in this for the long haul. If you’re not committed, well, it wasn’t meant to be, and we’re not going to try to convince you otherwise.

We might change this in the future, but this works for us right now.

The final, never-ending step — cultivating the brotherhood:

Starting is obviously the hardest step. But you can’t end there.

Creating a lasting, lifelong brotherhood takes time, energy, and continual investment. You have to “show up” for your brothers on a regular basis. You need to hold space for them to become who they’re meant to be. You need to encourage them, challenge them, and push each other to reach new heights.

More than anything, you just need to show up.

Here are some ways you can do that:

Take an active interest in the desires, dreams, and goals of the men in your group. How can you tailor discussions, events, and adventures that help your friends achieve their dreams?
Regularly brief the group. What’s coming up next? What was something fun and memorable that happened the last time you all hung out?
Share the spotlight and encourage others (especially more withdrawn and introverted members) to share their voice and take a leadership role. Consider rotating coordination and leadership of meetings and events.
Teach via example. The more you show up in your fully alive, embodied masculinity, the more you will inspire others to do the same.
Make it damn near unmissable. Cultivate an experience and a group that no one wants to miss.

The primary key is to show up and give courageously to your fellow men.

The world needs more brotherhood. Will you create it?

We need more men to step up. We need more men showing up and leading by example.

Don’t wait until you’ve got it all figured out as a man. Don’t wait until you’re the perfect leader. Don’t wait until you have the perfect group of men. A ragtag group of misfits will do.

The world needs more courageous men banding together to challenge each other, to grow together. Wouldn’t you agree?

So here’s my challenge to you: Do one thing today to cultivate more brotherhood in your life.

Now, over to you: Have you ever felt a lack of brotherhood in your life? What are you going to do about it?

___________________

Jonathan Mead is a writer and coach who helps people build tribes around something they love to do and get paid handsomely for it. For more on building a tribe and getting paid to live courageously, download the free toolkit he made for you here.

How to Read a Book

Jeremy Anderberg — Mon, 17 Jun 2013 21:38:40 +0000

1. Open book.

2. Read words.

3. Close book.

4. Move on to next book.

Reading a book seems like a pretty straightforward task, doesn’t it? And in some cases, it is. If you’re reading purely for entertainment or leisure, it certainly can be that easy. There’s another kind of reading, though, in which we at least attempt to glean something of value from the book in our hands (whether in paper or tablet form). In that instance, you might be surprised to learn that it’s not as simple as opening the book and reading the words.

Why Do We Need Instructions on How to Read a Book?

“Some books are to be tasted, others to be swallowed, and some few to be chewed and digested.” –Francis Bacon

In 1940, Mortimer Adler wrote the first edition of what is now considered a classic of education, How to Read a Book. There have been subsequent editions that contain great information, but the bulk of what we’ll be covering today is from Adler’s words of advice from nearly 75 years ago.

He states that there are four types of reading:

Elementary - This is just what it sounds like. It’s what we learn in elementary school and basically gets us to the point that we can understand the words on a page and read them, and follow a basic plot or line of understanding, but not much more.
Inspectional - This is basically skimming. You look at the highlights, read the beginning and end, and try to pick up as much as you can about what the author is trying to say. I’ll bet you did plenty of this with high school reading assignments; I know I did. Think of SparkNotes when you think of inspectional reading.
Analytical - This is where you really dive into a text. You read slowly and closely, you take notes, you look up words or references you don’t understand, and you try to get into the author’s head in order to be able to really get what’s being said.
Syntopical - This is mostly used by writers and professors. It’s where you read multiple books on a single subject and form a thesis or original thought by comparing and contrasting various other authors’ thoughts. This is time and research intensive, and it’s not likely that you’ll do this type of reading very much after college, unless your profession or hobby calls for it.

This post will cover inspectional and analytical reading, and we’ll focus mostly on analytical. If you’re reading this blog, you likely have mastered the elementary level. Inspectional reading is still useful, especially when trying to learn new things quickly, or if you’re just trying to get the gist of what something is about. I won’t cover syntopical reading in this post, as it’s just not used much by Average Joe Reader.

Analytical reading is where most readers fall short. The average high schooler in America reads at a 5th grade level, and the average adult American reads somewhere between the 7th and 8th grade levels. This is where most popular fiction actually falls. For men, think Tom Clancy, Clive Cussler, Louis L’Amour, etc. These are books that are incredibly entertaining, and a great way to spend a weekend afternoon, but if we’re honest with ourselves, don’t challenge either our minds or manliness all that much. There are some fine examples of manhood in those characters to be sure, but the point is that you won’t get more out of reading them once than you will out of reading them five times. It’s also why these are the types of books that are always on the bestseller lists — they cater to the level that most Americans can actually read at.

How come people can’t read at a higher level? Are we a society full of dopes? Hardly. Adler argues that the reason actually lies in our education. Once we reach the point of elementary reading, it’s assumed that we can now read. And to a point, we can. But we never actually learn how to digest or critique a book. So we get to high school and college and get overloaded with reading assignments that we’re supposed to write long papers about, and yet we’ve never learned how to truly dissect a book and get the most value out of it.

That’s our task today with this post. Again, I’ll mostly cover analytical reading, but I’ll also touch on inspectional reading, and a couple other related tidbits as well.

Inspectional Reading

As mentioned above, there are certainly times when inspectional reading is appropriate. It’s particularly useful when you’re at the bookstore trying to pick out your next book and deciding if the unknown object in front of you is worth the dough. (The good news is that you can also do this with ebooks — in most cases you can scan the cover, the table of contents, the introduction, etc. before actually buying.) This type of reading is also handy when trying to learn new things quickly, or when you’re just trying to get the gist of something. It’s great for the kind of reading you should be doing to stay current in your career as well; books related to a certain industry can often be full of fluff and chapters that just don’t apply to your particular job, and inspectional reading lets you glean the things that are actually helpful without wasting time on irrelevant material.

You can often get a pretty good feel for a book with inspectional reading by following the steps below. (To get the most out of this, you can actually follow along with a book off your shelf — it will only take 5-10 minutes.):

Read the title and look at the front and back covers of the book. This seems obvious, but if you pay attention, you can glean much more than you would have originally thought from just the cover of the book. What’s the title? Spend 10 seconds thinking about the title and subtitles. What is it telling you? We often glance over titles, but they often offer deep insight into the meaning of the book. I think of some of the classics I’ve recently read, The Sun Also Rises, The Grapes of Wrath, even Frankenstein. There’s more to these titles than meets the eye. In that last example, I’m told that the book is really more about Victor Frankenstein than about the monster he creates. It’s more about his human character than about horror. Are there images on the cover? What could those images be conveying? An incredible amount of time and money goes into cover art, so don’t neglect it. What does the blurb on the back of the book say? We often quickly scan these, but if we’re paying attention, they give us a great, succinct plot that often reveals what the book is truly about. Now it should be said that sometimes titles, cover art, and blurbs are designed more for marketing and increasing sales than they are about accurately conveying the ideas of the book, but they can usually still provide us with valuable clues as to the book’s content.
Pay special attention to the first pages of the book: the table of contents, the preface, the prologue, etc. These are incredibly useful pages. The table of contents will give you an outline of the entire book, which with non-fiction can tell you much of what you need to know right there. It’s a little harder with fiction, and many novels don’t have a table of contents, but take advantage of the ones that do. Especially with novels that are considered classics, you’ll often get all kinds of introductions and prefaces. For instance, my 50th anniversary one-volume edition of The Lord of the Rings has a very detailed three-page table of contents. That’s followed by a “Note on the Text” that gives me a bit of its publishing history and Tolkien’s process in writing. I then have a “Note on the 50th Anniversary Edition” that tells me that certain changes were made using Tolkien’s notes and journals. There’s then a foreword from Tolkien himself that tells a little bit of his own purpose in writing. And then I get to the prologue, which is part of the book itself. Even reading just the first sentence tells me, roughly, what the entire series is about: “The book is largely concerned with Hobbits, and from its pages a reader may discover much of their character and a little of their history.”
For non-fiction, skim headings and read the concluding chapter. The headings will actually often tell you the bulk of what you need to know of any non-fiction book. The text beneath the headings is often just fleshing out that main thought or theme. You can also read the conclusion to get a feel for what the author thought the main purpose or point of the book was. This is a little harder with fiction, as you don’t often get much for headings (outside of chapter titles), and at least for me, I certainly don’t want to know the end of the book. Although, I do know a fair amount of people who do; I still don’t understand that.
Consider reading some reviews of the book. Your most likely destination will be Amazon. Often the top-rated review on Amazon offers a lot of information about the book – a summary and/or some of the book’s strengths and weaknesses. Unfortunately, you also have to take Amazon reviews with a grain of salt. Some negative reviews are from people who perhaps read a chapter and didn’t like something (see below regarding how to critique a book), or didn’t read the book at all! And sometimes people simply have an axe to grind against the author and are trying to “sabotage” them. And sadly when it comes to positive reviews, authors and publishers these days will sometimes pay for fake reviews of the book (a good clue for this is a whole boatload of 5-star reviews posted on the very same day/week the book is released). So look at the aggregate rating the book has received, then read a few 5-star, 3-star, and 1-star reviews and evaluate their credibility in order to get a better overall sense of the quality of the book.

Analytical Reading

You don’t need to do this type of reading for just anything. Only undertake it if you really want to get the most out of the book in front of you. Even Adler mentioned that not every book deserves this thorough treatment. But, many do. To read a great book and simply throw it back on the shelf to collect dust is in many ways a waste. The tips below apply to both fiction and non-fiction, but I’ll note where something may differ.

Let’s find out how to get the most out of what we read:

First, look up a bit about the author and the other books he/she has written. This is a personal thing. Before I pick up a book, I almost always look up the author and/or the book itself on Wikipedia. I like to know how old the writer is, what some of his or her motivations were, how autobiographical it may be if it’s a novel (you’d be surprised how many are), etc. This just gives you a little context into the author’s life that will hopefully help you understand the book a little better.

Second, do a quick inspectional reading. This is partially why I wanted to cover inspectional reading in the first place. A good, thorough reading of any book will include it. Look at the cover, always read the opening pages, etc. I know far too many people who never read introductions and just get right into page one. You’re skipping the valuable information that can actually frame the entire way you read the book. You don’t need to jump ahead to the conclusion, but at least get all that you can out of the cover and those opening pages.

Third, read the book all the way through, somewhat quickly. Adler actually calls this a “superficial reading”; you’re simply trying to digest the overall purpose of the book. Now, this doesn’t necessarily mean speed-reading. It more means that you won’t stop and scrutinize the meaning of each and every paragraph. It means that when you get stuck in a place that’s hard to understand, you’ll keep on going anyway. It means that when the story slows down a little and gets boring, you don’t just read 10 pages a day, but you’ll keep powering through with the purpose of understanding the flow of the book as well as you can right off the bat. In this reading you are underlining or circling or taking notes on things you have questions about, but you aren’t looking into those questions just yet. When you’re done with the book, go back through and look at what you underlined or circled or took some notes about. Try your best to answer a few of those questions you had. If you have the time and desire, re-read the whole thing again. I often do a semi-quick reading like this for many classics that I’m reading for the first time, but then I’ll go back a few months later (okay, sometimes it ends up being years) and read it a little more slowly.

This is where many people struggle with reading older or more complicated books. You might stop 50 pages into The Iliad because you’re just too confused about the language and the style. It’s actually best to just power through that and understand what you can, and then come back to your misunderstandings later. Better to have some knowledge than none at all.

Fourth, use aids, only if you have to. If there is a word you don’t know, first look at the context to try to discern its meaning. Use your own brain to get things going. If it’s something you simply can’t get past, or the word is clearly too important for you to glance over, then pull out the dictionary. If there’s a cultural reference that you can tell is important to understanding the particular passage, Google it. The main point is that you can use the tools around you, but don’t lean on them. Let your brain work a little bit before letting Google work for you.

Fifth, answer the following four questions as best as you can. Now, these questions could have been listed as the first step, as you should keep these in mind from the second you start reading. But, they quite obviously can’t be answered until you’ve read the book. This, Adler says, is actually the key to analytical reading. To be able to answer these questions shows that you have at least some understanding of the book. If you can’t answer them, you probably haven’t quite paid attention well enough. Also, it’s my opinion that you should actually write (or type) these answers out. Consider it to be like a book journal. It’ll stay with you and become much more ingrained than if you just answer them in your head.

What is the book about, as a whole? This is essentially the back cover blurb. Don’t cheat, though. Come up, in your own words, with a few sentences or even a paragraph that describes what the book is about. This can actually be surface level; you don’t have to dig too deep. For instance, boy meets girl, boy falls in love with girl, boy makes stupid mistake and distances himself from girl, boy redeems himself and gets the girl.
What is being said in detail, and how? This is where you start to dig a little deeper. When you’re done with that first reading of the book, Adler recommends writing an outline of the book yourself so you get a feel for its organization and overall tenor. Briefly go back and page through the book, jogging your memory of the key points. With non-fiction, outlining is pretty straightforward. With fiction, you could do it by chapter or by setting/scene. By chapter you would simply list the chapter numbers/names and a couple sentences of what it’s about. For books with very short chapters, it could even just be a few words. For setting/scene, you just follow the characters around and say what happened of significance there. I just finished The Sun Also Rises, which could be segmented into its various settings: Paris, the fishing trip, Pamplona, and post-Pamplona where the characters go their separate ways.
Is the book true, in whole or in part? These last two questions are where we get to the meat of reading. As before, for non-fiction, this is a relatively easy (or at least easier) question to answer. Is what the author said true? Are the facts they presented true? With fiction, it’s more about asking if what was written is true to the general human experience, or even to your own experience. In The Great Gatsby, is that feeling of loss and the futileness of great wealth true to the human experience? I would certainly say so. This is partly what turns great books into classics. They ultimately speak to the most basic truths of humanity in story form.
What of it? What’s the significance? If the book is indeed saying something true about the human experience, or about manliness, what’s the takeaway? If something strikes a chord with you, and you do nothing with it, it becomes at least partially wasted. There is something to be said about literature that stands on its own merits of simply being great literature, like art, but I’ve learned there is almost always a takeaway. Or at least a way in which you may think differently about the world. My understanding of life in America during the Dust Bowl was greatly increased after reading The Grapes of Wrath. There wasn’t necessarily something I would do in reaction to it, but my appreciation for farmers and farming families of that time period certainly grew. That’s definitely a valuable takeaway.

Sixth, critique and share your thoughts with others. Notice that this step is dead last. Only after having read the entire book, and thoughtfully answered the questions above, can you critique or have meaningful discussions about the book. When reading Amazon reviews, it’s clear when someone stopped reading three chapters in and gave a terrible review. Be extra careful about coming right out and saying, “I understand the book.” You can certainly understand parts of a book, but to have no questions at all probably means that it wasn’t actually a good book to start with, or you are full of yourself. When discussing, be precise in your areas of agreement or disagreement. To simply say, “This is stupid,” or, “I don’t like it,” offers nothing to a conversation. Also know that you don’t have to agree or disagree with everything about or in a book. You can love some parts and really dislike others.

Now you’ve read a book for all its worth! Huzzah! To execute all of these practices for every book you read would be exhausting and time-consuming. I know that my enjoyment would probably be lessened if I did this for everything I read. So, take a few points and apply them to your reading. Personally, I resolved to read the difficult books I encounter all the way through (not something I’ve always done in the past), and to keep a short journal of every book I read that answers, at least in part, the four questions above.

Why Read Analytically?

This can sound like a lot of work, and you may be asking yourself if analytical reading is really worthwhile. Isn’t reading something you do for pleasure and entertainment? Partially, yes. You certainly don’t need to be sketching out an outline while you’re reading Dan Brown’s Inferno on the beach this summer (although maybe doing so will help you solve the mystery before Langdon does).

As the late great Stephen Covey taught us, however, a man should always be “sharpening the saw.” This means keeping yourself sharp in all areas of your life. Doing any kind of reading is beneficial, but engaging in analytical reading from time to time can greatly enhance these benefits and help us become better men in several ways:

Increases your attention span. The internet has given us more reading opportunities than ever before. But oftentimes our cyber reading consists of skimming and/or quickly jumping from one thing to the next without giving each much thought at all. Have you ever tried to talk to someone about something you read on the net earlier in the day only to find you couldn’t really recall much about it? Reading a book analytically gives your focus and your skills for diving into a single thing deeply and mining it for all it’s worth some much needed training and exercise. It greatly sharpens your ability to handle something as a whole, rather than in part.

Enhances your critical thinking abilities. You can read, but how are you at examining something critically? Analytical reading hones your ability to evaluate truth, weigh evidence and sources, synthesize information, make connections between different things, evaluate claims, discover wisdom hidden below the surface, understand others’ motivations, interpret symbolism, and draw your own conclusions. Quite obviously these skills are not limited to helping you better enjoy books, but are absolutely vital in becoming an independent, perceptive, and well-informed citizen and man.

Shapes you into a better man. A man who sees personal growth as being something important to him will take time to meditate on life and consider the areas in which he can improve. Books facilitate this reflection in a unique way because they present us with characters or stories (be they real-life or fictional) that we can relate to in at least some small way.

As an example, I just finished the recent sci-fi hit, Wool. It’s a unique story with great characters, and the author is fast becoming a celebrity in the indie publishing world. I could have quite easily read it and moved on to the next book in the series. But to pause, and read through passages that I highlighted, and take even just 10 minutes considering what can be learned from the book gave me a greater reading experience. Wool forced me to ask myself if there are areas of improvement in my life that I’ve glanced over simply because it’s something I’ve always done. It forced me to ask about the ways in which I’ve lessened risk simply because it was the easier way to live. I learned that doing the right thing is often terribly uncomfortable. It’s not the first time I’ve learned that lesson, but seeing it again in a unique story gives me yet another chance to be reminded of the importance of that lesson.

Reading analytically offers valuable opportunities for this kind of needed reflection and can help you think through the kind of man you are, don’t want to be, and definitely hope to become.

Additional Reading Tidbits

Consider paper vs. ebook. I was once a Kindle devotee. I still do a lot of reading on it, but I’ve moved to actually preferring paper. Even though you can scan all your Kindle notes and highlights at once, it’s actually easier to navigate a paper book, and skim it, in my opinion. There’s also something to be said about the reading experience. With digital devices, you really only get one sense involved — sight. With a physical book, you get multiple senses involved, making it a more immersive experience. You can feel the paper on your fingers as you turn the page, you can smell that new book (or old book) smell that is so distinct. What’s your preference? Has it changed?
Consider new vs. used. This is just a personal thing, but I love used books in many cases. I appreciate just knowing that someone before me has enjoyed this very text. Especially when it’s an old book, it’s always fun to wonder how many people had their eyes on these words, and what kind of setting they were in. On an airplane in 1960? In a bar in the 80s? Perhaps in college just a few years ago?
Consider your variety of fiction vs. non-fiction. There are significant benefits to reading a variety of genres. I am almost always reading one fiction and one non-fiction book at the same time. Your mind grows as you experience new things. Don’t pigeonhole yourself into thinking you only like one genre. I recently read some science fiction (something I didn’t think I liked very much) at the recommendation of a friend, and now I want to read much more. I’m hooked.
Consider whether to take notes in the book itself. I love underlining great sentences and taking short notes in pencil of things that pop into my head as I read. The only time I don’t do this is when it’s a book I plan on either giving to a friend to read, or giving away to Goodwill or a used bookstore. Some people are quite opinionated about this one, so let’s hear your thoughts!

Looking for some motivation to start reading analytically or simply start reading, period? Later this month we’ll be launching an AoM Book Club. Stay tuned for details!

What tips do you have to make reading the most worthwhile experience it can be?

Manvotional: A Little Fellow Follows Me

Brett & Kate McKay — Sun, 16 Jun 2013 02:07:59 +0000

Editor’s Note: In honor of Father’s Day, I wanted to share an anonymously-penned poem that’s hung in my parents’ home for as long as I can remember. I never gave it much thought as a kid, but since becoming a dad, it’s become one of my favorite poems. It’s a simple, gentle reminder to always be your best self because you’ve got a little person who thinks the world of you. Happy Father’s Day to all the loving and honorable dads out there!

A careful man I want to be –
a little fellow follows me.
I do not dare to go astray,
for fear he’ll go the self-same way.
I cannot once escape his eyes.
Whatever he sees me do he tries.
Like me he says he’s going to be –
that little chap who follows me…
He knows that I am big and fine –
And believes in every word of mine.
The base in me he must not see –
that little chap who follows me…
But after all it’s easier,
that brighter road to climb,
With little hands behind me –
to push me all the time.
And I reckon I’m a better man
than what I used to be…
Because I have this lad at home
who thinks the world of me.

Shave and a Haircut: Razorbacks Barbershop [VIDEO]

Brett — Sat, 15 Jun 2013 22:13:04 +0000

In what I hope will be the beginning of new video series, I pay a visit to Razorbacks Barbershop in Long Beach, CA to get a shave and a haircut and talk to the owners Pedro and Scotty about barbering and their line of pomades and shave soaps, Imperial Barber Products (it’s what I use!).

If you’d like to see more “Shave and a Haircut” videos, please share and let us know in the comments what shop we should visit next!

Also, make sure to subscribe to our YouTube Channel!

New Art of Manliness Store (Plus New T-shirts & Posters)

Brett & Kate McKay — Fri, 14 Jun 2013 20:45:16 +0000

For years now we’ve had an online store that sold different Art of Manliness themed products like t-shirts, posters, and stationery.

But there were a few problems.

First, the shopping experience in the AoM Store was a pain in the butt. If you wanted an AoM t-shirt, you had to go to the Tankfarm site; if you wanted stationery, you had to go to the Page Stationery website; and if you wanted posters, you had to use a special PayPal cart that I created.

How annoying is that? You had to visit three different sites and enter your credit card info three different times just so you could get a t-shirt, poster, and a box of AoM stationery. What’s more, if you had a question about your order, you had to check with three different companies.

Second, I was handling the fulfillment and shipping on posters and pocket notebooks myself. That wasn’t a big deal when we were first starting out, but I found myself devoting more and more of my time each week to rolling posters and stuffing them in tubes instead of creating virile content to help improve the lives of men. Christmastime was the worst. And because I was a rank amateur when it came to shipping and fulfilling, I biffed many an order.

To solve the crappy shopping experience and to ensure I never pull another all-nighter rolling posters, I’m happy to announce that we’ve partnered with ROBYN Promotions in Oklahoma City to create a new shopping experience for the Art of Manliness Store.

The New Art of Manliness Store

One-stop shopping. You can now order all our items in a single (and secure) shopping cart. No more visiting multiple sites to get what you want.

Order tracking. When people ordered posters from me, they had no clue on their order status. I didn’t either. I didn’t have order tracking. Now we do. As soon as your order ships, you’ll get an email with your tracking number so you can see how soon you’ll have your manly products.

Faster order turn-around. I could only devote Fridays to shipping posters and notebooks. That’s all the time I had. So if you ordered something on Friday after I visited the post office, it would be a week before your order would even get sent. With the new AoM store, your order will be shipped within 48 business hours. No more waiting nearly two weeks to get your order.

Better customer service. Because we have dedicated professionals taking care of shipping and handling, we can offer better customer service. If you have a question about your order, just contact us.

I want to thank Eric Granata at ROBYN for his work on getting the new store going.

New Products

In addition to launching a new store platform, we’re also excited to announce a bunch of new products.

New Posters — Featuring the Artwork of Ted Slampyak

Over the past few years, we’ve had the privilege of working with illustrator Ted Slampyak to create some awesome visual guides for the Art of Manliness. Many of you have requested posters featuring his artwork. We are happy to oblige.

Know Your Lifts

Ted has created a set of visual guides demonstrating proper weight lifting technique that we call “Know Your Lifts.” Now you can buy the visual guides as posters. They’re perfect for your home gym or Crossfit Box. We currently offer three posters: high-bar back squat, deadlift, and overhead press. Save $6 when you buy the complete set.

Cell Phone Etiquette Posters

Back in January, we worked with Ted to create a set of vintage-inspired propaganda posters on cell phone etiquette. It’s been one of our most popular posts of the year. Now you can buy a real-life poster for your office or classroom to remind people to practice good smartphone etiquette. Save $10 by buying the complete set.

In addition to these new posters, you can also buy our popular “If” and “Man in the Arena” posters.

New T-shirts

The gents at Tankfarm Clothing have once again designed a set of virile themed t-shirts for the Art of Manliness.

In addition to the new designs, we also have a few of our classic designs in stock like “Gentleman and Scholar”, “Rough Rider”, and “Strength & Honor”.

Other Virile Products

Besides t-shirts and posters, you’ll find some other great products in our online store.

AoM Pocket Notebooks

Far from being a modern fad, the pocket notebook has a long, important, and manly history. Pocket notebooks were part of the arsenal of a long list of great men from Thomas Jefferson to Thomas Edison. Follow in their footsteps by carrying your own official AoM pocket notebook where you can write down all your manly ponderings and ideas. The cover has John L. Sullivan with the words “Semper Virilis” (Always Manly) circling his head. On the inside of the front cover, you’ll find the poem “If” by Rudyard Kipling, and on the inside back cover, you’ll find Teddy Roosevelt’s “Man in the Arena” speech.

AoM Letterpress Stationery and Coasters

A gentleman understands the power of a handwritten note. Unfortunately, quality stationery designed specifically for men is hard to find.

That’s why Art of Manliness has teamed up with Page Stationery to create a line of manly correspondence cards, perfect for jotting off a quick note.

We’ve also have some letterpress coasters for your manly beverages.

Special Launch Giveaway

To celebrate the launch of our new store and new products, we’re having a giveaway. The prize is any one item from the new AoM store. To enter, visit the Art of Manliness store, pick out an item that you’d like, and leave a comment below sharing which item you want.

Deadline to enter is Friday, June 21, 2013 at 5PM CDT. We’ll then pick three random comments to determine our three lucky winners.

As an incentive to enter, every one who enters will be sent a 10% discount code for the AoM store at the end of the contest.

Hurts So Good: A Beginner’s Guide Self-Myofascial/Trigger Point Release

Brett & Kate McKay — Thu, 13 Jun 2013 18:04:28 +0000

This post is brought to you by Poland Spring® Brand 100% Natural Spring Water.What’s this?

We can’t all afford a personal masseuse or athletic trainer to regularly rub out the kinks, soreness, and tight spots in our muscles. But there is a way to massage oneself, with the benefit of being able to control exactly where and how much pressure to apply. For that reason, in recent years, doing exercises with foam rollers, massage balls, and the like has gained immense popularity. Yet with new products and cheesy accompanying infomercials coming out all the time, knowing what to do and how to do it can be an intimidating task. At worst, doing exercises wrong can lead to pain and discomfort, and ultimately injury.

You may have heard varying terms for these exercises: trigger point release, active release techniques, or perhaps something similar. The technical term, however, is self-myofascial release (SMR). Other terms may mean different things for different people, so we’ll stick with SMR for the purposes of this post.

Benefits of Foam Rolling

Let’s dissect this science-y term we’ve just learned before diving into the how-tos of the various exercises.

Fascia, as physical therapist Jane Anderberg described it to me, is much like that slimy layer on a chicken breast that you can peel off. Every structure in the body — organs, muscles, nerves, blood vessels, etc. — is covered in a layer of fascia. It’s almost akin to oil in your car’s engine — it allows everything to run smoothly and slide without friction. Through the overstress of our muscles, whether through overuse or trauma, our layers of fascia can get tears in them. When the tears don’t heal properly, the various layers of fascia in your body can adhere together in spots (called adhesions), which will cause pain and discomfort. These adhesions keep your muscles from working the way they’re supposed to, which keeps your body from living up to its potential for strong and natural movement.

This is where where foam rolling and other similar exercises come into play. When we put pressure on these adhesions, they are released, and we can get back to optimal physical performance.

In addition to releasing these adhesions, SMR also has some general benefits for our bodies:

aids in preventing injuries
gets rid of knots and tightness in your muscles
physically de-stresses your body so it can work more efficiently
increases flexibility
increases blood flow, which helps for faster recovery from workouts
reduces soreness from workouts

To put together a comprehensive tutorial on some of the best SMR exercises you can perform, I talked to Damyko Busby a trainer who specializes in trigger point release at the Sky Fitness and Well Being gym here in Tulsa, OK.

What You’ll Need

Damyko used Trigger Point Performance products in his photo demonstration. They’re a bit pricy, but they can give you a more targeted massage. If you don’t want to fork over the dough for Trigger Point Performance, you can get by with…
Foam roller. Several different foam rollers exist on the market at different price levels. A plain-old high density foam roller is the most affordable option and will get the job done. The only problem is after months of use, they start to lose their round shape. A foam roller with PVC pipe in the middle solves that problem. The added sturdiness of the PVC pipe also gives a deeper, more intense massage. If you want to get really targeted with your SMR, you can get foam rollers that have grids molded onto the surface.
Ball. Many physical therapists and mobility trainers recommend a lacrosse ball for self-myofascial release. I’ve been using one for a few months now and can’t complain. You can pick one up at Academy Sports for a few bucks.
Yoga block. Some of the exercises utilize a yoga block. Not necessary, but can come in handy.
Mismatched compression socks (optional).

General Guidelines

Roll on the foam roller/ball until you feel a “trigger point” or “hot spot.” You’ll know you found one when it hurts. When you find a trigger point, stop and just rest on the foam roller for 10 to 20 seconds. Contrary to popular belief, it’s the pressure, not the rolling, that smooths fascia.
Avoid applying pressure on bones and joints. Just muscle.
Combine an abbreviated SMR with your regular warm-up on workout days. I like to focus on the spots that I have the most trouble with. Use one of your rest days to devote 30 to 45 minutes to SMR for your whole body.
Drink plenty of water after an intense SMR session.

Feet

Using Trigger Point Footballer

1. Start with Footballer on heel. 2. Roll to ball of foot, stopping and applying pressure on any trigger points you find along the way. 3. Roll the Footballer on the inside of your sole. 4. And on the outside. Do the same with the other foot.

Using Lacrosse Ball or Massage Ball

You can use a lacrosse ball for this exercise. 1. Start at ball of your foot. 2. Roll to your heel, stopping and applying pressure on any trigger points you find along the way. Don’t forget to get the insides and outsides of your feet.

Soleus (Inner Calf)

Using a Foam Roller

Put one leg on top of the foam roller with your other leg crossed on top. Roll up and down your inner-calf to find your hot spots. When you find a hot spot, stop and lift your butt off the ground with your hands to apply more pressure on your leg. In addition to applying steady pressure on your trigger points, you can also rock side-to-side on them.

Using Trigger Point Footballer

1. Place Footballer on the yoga block and your calf on the Footballer. 2. Place your other leg on top of the leg that you’re treating. 2. Roll all the way down your calf to your heel and all the way up near your knee. Stop on any trigger points and apply downward pressure on them. 4. Rotate your leg in to really work that soleus muscle.

Using Lacrosse or Massage Ball

1. Place ball on yoga block, one leg on ball, and the other leg on top of the leg you’re treating. Roll up and down leg to find trigger points. 2. When you find a trigger point, point your toe forward and hold for a few seconds. 3. Then point your toe back towards you and hold. Alternate between pointing forward and back a few times. 4. Don’t forget to really work the inside of the soleus.

Gastrocneumius (Outer Calf)

Using Trigger Point Footballer

Using Lacrosse or Massage Ball

You can do the same thing with a ball. When you find a hot spot, use your non-supporting hand to rock your leg back and forth on the ball. It’s going to hurt, but it’s the good kind of hurt.

Quads

Using Trigger Point Quadballer

1. Place the Quadballler just above your knee. 2. Lie down and prop yourself up on your forearms. Roll the Quadballer up and down your quad, stopping on any trigger points. Gently rock side-to-side. 3. In addition to rocking side-to-side on hot spots, bend your leg back at your knee. Hold for a few seconds. 4. Straighten your leg. Hold. Alternate bending and straightening your leg on your hot spots on your quad. You can do this with a foam roller too.

Hip Adductors

Using Trigger Point Quadballer

1. Place Quadballer on inside of your thigh. 2. Lie down, propping yourself up on your forearms. Roll Quadballer up to your groin, stopping on any trigger points. Apply pressure. 3. Straighten your leg and hold for a few seconds. 4. Bend your leg at your knee and hold. Alternate between straightening and bending on hot spots.

Using Foam Roller

1. Start with foam roller near your knee on the inside of your thigh. 2. Roll up towards your groin, stopping on any trigger points. 3. With the foam roller, you can go higher up your adductor than you can with a Quadballer. Repeat on other leg.

IT Band

This is my favorite trigger point release exercise. If you run a lot, chances are you’ve experienced “runner’s knee.” Runner’s knee is caused by a tightening in your Iliotibial band, or IT band. The IT band is a thick band of fascia running on the side of your leg from your knee to your pelvis. Massaging your IT band can help loosen up tightness and prevent future injuries. Take it easy when you’re first starting out rolling your IT band. It’s going to hurt.

1. We’re going to roll the foam roller up and down the side of our leg starting at the top of the hip and down to just above the knee. 2. Lean back on your arm and bend your non-treated leg for added support. Roll up and down IT band, stopping on any hot spots. 3. If you really want to dig into those trigger points, lift both legs off the ground. Grimace. 4. In addition to applying steady pressure on hot spots, rock side-to-side on them. Repeat on other leg.

1. Turn your body in so you really work the inner part of your IT band. 2. Turn your body out to work the outer part.

Piriformis

This is my other favorite area to work during SMR sessions. If you spend your day sitting down like most folks, your piriformis muscle is probably very tight. Giving your butt a deep massage with a foam roller or ball will help alleviate some of that tightness.

Using Foam Roller

1. Sit on the foam roller and shift all your weight to one side of your butt. Your piriformis is located near your hip joint. You’ll know you’ve found it when it starts hurting so good. Cross your other foot over your knee. 2. Roll backwards and forwards to look for trigger points. Hold when you find them. Repeat on other side.

Using Lacrosse or Massage Ball

1. Place ball on piriformis. 2. Find hot spots on piriformis and hold. 3. To really dig into it, lift the knee up on the side that you’re working. 4. Lower your knee like you’re doing a butterfly stretch. Hold. Bring back up. Alternate between a down and up position.

1. Another way to work your piriformis with the ball is to straighten your leg out in front of you. 2. Maintaining a straight leg, bring your leg out to the side. Hold. Repeat on other piriformis.

Lats

1. Lay on your side with the foam roller beneath your lat near your armpit. 2. Work the roller down your side stopping and holding on trigger points. Don’t go too far down, though! You always want to stay on muscle. 3. To really work those hot spots, rock back and forth on the foam roller. 4. Rotate until your face is looking up at the ceiling and roll up and down to work the lats closer to your spine. Repeat on other side.

Biceps

1. Lie on your stomach with your bicep resting on the foam roller. Work the roller up and down your bicep to find trigger points. 2. When you find a trigger point, rotate your arm in so that your thumb is pointing down. Hold. 3. Rotate your arm so that your thumb is pointing up. Hold. 4. Rotate your arm in and out like this for a few cycles. Repeat on other bicep.

Back/Trapezius

1. Place roller at base of spine. 2. Lean back. 3. Work your way up and down roller stopping on any hot spots. Be careful about applying too much pressure to your spine. 4. When the roller reaches your trapezius, arch your back and hold.

5. With the roller beneath your trapezius, give yourself a hug. Hold. 6. Lift your arms straight in front of you. Hold. Alternate between self-hugs and raising your arms.

This next exercise requires two Trigger Point therapy massage balls and the little bag that holds them (don’t snicker). We’ll be hitting the fascia on the lower part of the trapezius.

1. Lie back on the ground so that both Trigger Point balls are in-between your shoulder blades. 2. You may want to rest your head on a yoga block so you can apply enough pressure on the fascia you’re going to work. 3. Lift your arms straight in front of you. Hold. 4. Spread your arms crucifix style. Hold.

Biiig hug! Aww… owww!

5. Lift your arms straight out. 6. Bring your right arm back above your head. Hold. 7. Bring your left arm back above your head. Look at that face. That’s the face of a man who’s getting rejuvenating deep tissue massage.

Traps with a Lacrosse or Massage Ball

1. Place ball between the wall and upper part of your trapezius. 2. Turn your body away from the wall. 3. Roll back on ball until you find your hot spots. 3. Lift arm straight out. Apply pressure on hot spot. Repeat on other side.

5. Give yourself a hug. 6. Pull your arm on the side that you’re working on the ball across your body with your other arm.

Chest

1. Place ball on pec and press down with both hands. 2. Roll ball around on pec until you find a hot spot and hold for a few seconds.

To apply more pressure on the ball you can use a yoga block.

Or you can place the yoga ball on the wall to get more pressure.

Deltoids (Shoulders)

1. Stand with your shoulder to the wall. Place massage ball between you and wall. 2. Roll deltoid on ball until you find trigger points. 3. Really focus on the front part of your shoulder.

1-2. Use a yoga block to apply more pressure.

Neck

1. Rest your neck on the foam roller, like you’re using it for a pillow. 2. Turn your head to your right. 3. Then to your left. No need to apply pressure -your own bodyweight will suffice.

5. Shift your weight on to your right side. 6. Perform a slight bridge by lifting your hips off the ground. 7. Rotate all the way onto your side. 8. Take a nap. Just kidding. Hold for a few seconds and then repeat on the other side.

Big thanks to Damyko for taking the time to show us how to do some trigger point release. Another thanks to Jane Anderberg from Agility Physical Therapy and Sports Medicine in Denver for helping with the science.

How to Grout Tile

A Manly Guest Contributor — Wed, 12 Jun 2013 20:28:41 +0000

Editor’s Note: This is a guest post from Ethan Hagan at One Project Closer.

Grouting tile joints is one of the last steps for installing a tile floor, and if done properly, grout gives the floor a cohesive, finished look. To demonstrate the proper way to apply grout, I’ve partnered with Jim and Rich from Diamond Tile located in Baltimore, Maryland. Both of these guys have almost three decades of experience, and today they’re grouting a newly installed, basement floor.

If you’re considering installing tile, check out the One Project Closer project guide for How to Install a Tile Floor. It covers everything from preparing the subfloor, to marking guidelines, to laying and finishing tile.

Tools & Materials

Rich and Jim recommend Mapei brand products, and for this project they’re using Keracolor S, which is a cementitious grout with a polymer additive. The additive helps the grout dry harder and resist stains. Grout is available in sanded and un-sanded varieties. Sanded grout is appropriate for tile joints 1/8″ to 1/2″ wide. Smaller joints should be grouted with un-sanded grout. You may not find Mapei at your local DIY center. Instead, check with local tile suppliers.

The other tools and materials the guys are using include:

Small trowel
Grout float
Sponge
Two 5-gallon buckets of rinse water
Corded drill with mixing paddle
Gloves

Step 1: Mix the Grout

Mix up a large bucket of grout, and target a creamy consistency and uniform color. Rich advised that if the grout is too thick, it will be very difficult to spread. If the grout is too thin, it won’t properly adhere to the joint. Rich also recommended avoiding well water because it can cause the grout to effloresce, leaving a white haze after it cures.

Slaking is the process of leaving the grout undisturbed to allow the water to completely penetrate the dry ingredients. After the initial mix, let the grout slake for about five minutes before re-mixing everything.

Step 2: Spread the Grout

Start on one side, working across the floor in narrow rows to keep everything in reach.

Use the grout float to force the grout into the joints, packing them tight to eliminate any voids.

Hold the float at about a 45° angle as you go across the joints and scrape away excess grout.

Step 3: Sponge the Joints Clean

Sponging the grout too soon will pull it out of the joints, so let it set for about 15 minutes. After that, use a damp sponge to clean the face of the tiles in a light, circular motion.

Next, clean the sponge and go over the tile again, wiping at a slight diagonal to the joint. Use a different side of the sponge for each pass. If after a few hours a slight haze appears on the face of the tiles, it can be buffed off with a dry towel or cheesecloth.

Step 4: Continue Spreading and Sponging

Working in these small sections, you’ll complete the entire floor.

Step 5: Let It Cure

The grout needs about 24 hours before the floor is ready for foot traffic. Jim and Rich usually don’t recommend sealing the grout because modern products often include stain resistance. Plus, any benefit is short-lived. The only exception is high-traffic areas that will be prone to stains (like the kitchen).

Finished

Ethan Hagan owns and operates a home improvement website called One Project Closer. On One Project Closer you’ll learn how to tackle projects with expert knowledge from professional contractors. OPC also provides coupons to home improvement centers, like this Home Depot Coupon page. Check out OPC for full details, and follow them on Facebook.

Outfitted & Equipped: Summer Day Hike

Brett — Wed, 12 Jun 2013 16:11:33 +0000

This post is sponsored by Best Buy. Find all the tools to capture, save and share life’s moments.How does Outfitted and Equipped work? The FAQ.

The official start of summer is still about a week away, but hiking season is in full swing. Whether you’re in the Rocky Mountains of the West, the Smoky Mountains of the East, or the rolling hills of the Midwest, a summer hike on a weekend day is one of the most enjoyable activities one can do. Be it alone, with a friend, or with your family, hiking is accessible to nearly anyone, and a great way to get some sunshine as well as some exercise. We’ve put together a few essentials for your hike to make it as enjoyable and safe as can be whether you’re going for five miles or fifteen.

1. The Headlamp. Poler Headlamp. For longer or more popular trails (or that romantic sunrise hike), you may need to start when the sun is still below the horizon. It’s also great if you’re planning was a little amiss, and you aren’t back to your car before the sun sets. This headlamp goes right around your noggin, and is way more convenient than a flashlight.

2. The Ball Cap. Huckberry Explorer’s Cap. Your hat is essential for the summer hike. Its multiple benefits include keeping sweat out of your eyes, protecting your face and neck from sunburn, and also keeping your eyes shielded from the sun’s bright rays when they’re pounding down on you from above. This one from Huckberry is made in Seattle and very appropriately has a compass stitched on the back.

3. The Shirt. Icebreaker Tech T Lite. A good, light t-shirt will be a godsend on your hike. A cotton tee can get sweaty, sticky, and clammy. This one is made with merino wool which is surprisingly breathable and cool and also naturally resists odor and dries fast if you decide to take a quick dip in the stream.

4. The Food. Clif Bar Energy Variety Pack. Especially if you’re starting early, this makes a great start to your day if you didn’t have time to make a hearty breakfast. They also are the perfect snack when you take a fiver. Clif Bars are standard fare on hiking trails; with a good amount of carbs and some protein they’re pretty tasty and keep you going.

5. The Just-In-Case. Elite First Aid Kit. Includes various gauzes, wipes, bandages, adhesives, and pain relievers. You never know when you or your little one will stumble over a rock and scrape a knee, or God forbid something more serious. This is especially important if you’re in the backwoods for an extended period of time.

6. The Camera. Canon EOS Rebel Digital SLR. Whether you find yourself atop a mountain summit or along the banks of a misty river, there are few opportunities better for photo-taking than a good hike. Your phone may do the trick, but in my experience, hiking photos turn out to be some of the best you ever take, and you may want a few blown up as prints. Don’t take the risk of having blurry prints.

7. The Knife. Gerber Big Rock. Everyone should have a pocketknife on them at all times, and especially when you’re out hiking. Mine has come in handy on the trail for more uses than I could even list. It’s a safety tool, a survival tool, a tactical tool, a multi-tool, and more.

8. The Pants. Mountain Khakis Granite Creek Convertible. This is the perfect hiking pant. If there’s one thing you buy off this list, make it these pants. They are lightweight, but durable. They’re water resistant. They have tons of pockets for your camera, knife, map, etc. And best of all, they’re zip-offs. I prefer pants when going through woods, as you never know when a thorned plant will reach out to greet you. But for open spaces when it’s really hot, you’ll want the shorts. To top it off, they’re made in the US of A.

9. The Shoes. Danner St. Helens Hiking Boots. Don’t skimp on the shoes. This particular pair is very reasonably priced, and should last you a few years of serious hiking. The mid- to high-top is the way to go, in my opinion, as it protects your ankles from those potential slips over rocks. Hiking boots are also built sturdier than your standard athletic shoe to protect from the extra wear and tear. I’m always amazed when I see sandals on hiking trails; don’t be that guy.

10. The Socks. Fox River Hiking Socks. Special socks just for hiking? You bet! Believe it or not, they make a big difference. Water will dry noticeably faster, it will protect better than your average sock from blisters, and you won’t be gagging for fresh air when you take your shoes off after a long hike. You don’t need more than one pair unless you hike multiple times per week, so it’s not a strain on your wallet either.

11. The Rain Jacket. Sierra Trading Post Trabagon. Admittedly, this isn’t something you’ll use a lot. However, it could literally be a lifesaver if you get caught in a storm. Especially if you’re in mountain areas, storms come in almost every afternoon, and they can come fast. To be caught at high elevations in a cold rain is asking for hypothermia. This jacket is light, inexpensive, and will fold up just fine in the bottom of your pack.

12. The Matchbox. K&M Matchcase. Some match cases look cool but are poor quality; you don’t want to take chances with an item like this. K&M matchcases are made by a mom and pop operation based in Elk River, Idaho and come with a lifetime guarantee, and a compass too. Matches are essential gear for your multi-day backpacking trip, as well as for survival should you get lost. The compass will also come in handy should you lose the trail. Don’t know how to use it for navigation? No problem, we’ve got you covered.

13. The Skin-Saver. Sun Bum Sunscreen. It’s well documented that skin cancer is on the rise because we don’t protect our skin well enough from the sun. Don’t make that mistake when you’re out hiking; this water resistant and non-greasy sunscreen is perfect. I like this one because it works even when you’re active, doesn’t feel too heavy, and doesn’t contain hormone-altering chemicals like oxybenzone. For maximum effectiveness, re-apply every 80 minutes or so.

14. The Hydration. Eberlestock Hydration System. Keep yourself well-hydrated with this lightweight water bladder. Fits easily into your backpack, and is super convenient versus having multiple water bottles that need unscrewing every time you want a drink. I love this one because it’s easy to clean and easy to fill and the bladder is made of an antimicrobial material; you can leave water in it for months and it still tastes fresh and clean when you take a sip. Way better than the Camelbaks I’ve owned. Recommended by military veterans, it’s also super durable; mine held up during my Goruck Challenge while Camelbaks busted.

15. The Pack. Topo Designs Daypack. A good hiking backpack has a few defining characteristics. It’s sturdy and made high-quality material that won’t break down. It’s breathable, to lessen the sweat factor. It’s also waterproof, keeping the contents inside nice and dry. A good pack will have a few extra straps and pockets for your other various essentials. This pack has all of that and it’s made in the USA.

16. The Navigator. Topo Trail Map. Maps often come on digital devices these days, but on the trail, relying on a phone is a recipe for disappointment. Batteries die, cell signals fail, and the sun glares brightly off the screen. Having a paper trail map keeps you right where you need to be, and will keep you out of harm’s way should you get lost. Learn how to read a topographic map.