Comments on: Man to Man Episode #2: How to Keep a Long Distance Relationship Alive [VIDEO]

By: Steve

Steve — Fri, 08 Feb 2013 05:53:01 +0000

In fact, modern philosophers and serious poets and writers still go pen-to-paper to this day, based on the fact that it connects with your imagination and emotions more so than keyboard typing. I like the letter writing thing a lot actually, cool idea.

By: Aishah Zakariah

Aishah Zakariah — Mon, 14 Jan 2013 07:16:41 +0000

Hi there,
I wish to share with you my situation. I met Pete in Sydney(he’s scottish, working in sydney) and we hit it off well. I ended up spending my last few days with him and his friend. We kept in touch after via email and phonecalls. Then I went to visit him again in Sydney after a month. We then decided that this is what we both wanted. To be together. We hit it off well with each other’s friends. And we mentioned each other to our family and friends. 3 months later, he is coming to see me (next month). I am excited and very pleased. However, I saw his messages with an ex-lover, a girl he met during his holiday. (before he met me) Honestly, I am not comfortable that he ended the relationship with her using distance as an excuse. (he met her in Thailand) I also noticed the words he used on me was the same ones he used on that girl. (“amazing”, “told my mom about you”, “beautiful person”, “caring”) Although I think he genuinely likes me, I also think he falls in love too easily. I also think it was his fault to lead the girl on, making her think they might work out. Then ending the rship because he met me. I cannot understand his character. and it’s making me all nervous and scared to try to work us out.
Please advise.

By: Eric Granata

Eric Granata — Tue, 19 Oct 2010 16:05:54 +0000

That’s great to hear, Aaron! My wife and I dated for about three years before getting married and we only lived in the same town for about a month while dating. Fortunately there was only 200 miles between us so I visited most weekends and holidays.

I can only echo what has already been said. Letters, email, phone, etc. Brett’s remarks about sticking to the big picture stuff is interesting. We did the same thing. I think the reason that works is because it really aids in the discovery of each others’ values, personalities, etc.

By: Aaron

Aaron — Tue, 19 Oct 2010 06:16:13 +0000

I just wanted to say thank you so much to Brett, and everyone who contributed on here. This has been such an amazing encouragement to me, and I am beginning to see this as the blessing it is to our relationship. I have the web cam and writing utensils all set up and in full swing as well! I will surely be able to check back on this page regularly to either be encouraged or to find new advice. I know thus far the relationship has been progressing wonderfully. Many thanks to everyone, and again thank you Brett for providing a fourm for this to take place in.

-Aaron

By: Vince

Vince — Tue, 19 Oct 2010 04:28:05 +0000

Another idea. Have some prepackaged, open-ended conversation starters for the phone (she doesn’t have to know about them), not as a script, but to be brought up if you hit a lull, and one initial conversation starter to get the overall phone chat started. Plus, maybe come up with a set ritual for days when you don’t have a million things to say.

By: Vince

Vince — Tue, 19 Oct 2010 04:22:45 +0000

Long distance relationships are challenging, especially for men, because you feel that all you can do is sheer chat with each other. A real relationship is a mix of goofing around, talking about the details of your day, sharing mutually enjoyed activities, talking about the deep things on your heart or even SHARING COMFORTABLE SILENCES, among other things. You have to talk with your woman frankly about the problems ahead. Watching movies or doing activities over the phone, such as a game, are a nice way to mix things up. Head sets are a great idea. You can cook dinner while you chat or do something else. Your phone relationship should be closer to the dynamic that a regular relationship would have because incessant social pressure sets the bar too high and will cause you to drift apart.

By: Phoenix Men's Counseling

Phoenix Men's Counseling — Fri, 15 Oct 2010 20:49:27 +0000

Keeping a long-distance relationship alive is difficult, but not impossible. Although it’s helpful to choose your method of communication and create a schedule to talk, I think the most important thing to remember is to communicate about expectations, boundaries, and fears together. I think it’s important to communicate about difficult topics that come up, including the potential for meeting other people, unexpected situations and feelings that come up. How can you deal with loneliness and longing for each other in a healthy way, and not indulge in behaviors that might compromise your relationship, such as avoiding or withdrawing from difficult topics or ending a difficult phone conversation because it’s too hard to talk about it? If you and your partner can successfully navigate the unknown together, through topics like these.you’ll have a stronger partnership in the end.

By: msshiouu

msshiouu — Fri, 15 Oct 2010 07:55:39 +0000

I think that long distance relationships are perfect for being able to “live your life” and “find yourself” in college while still being with someone you love. However, you both have to want the same thing…emotional support, not physical support (not just sex…holding hands, kissing, sleeping together). College relationships move so quickly…I mean people get dogs and move in with e/o within a couple of months. There’s going to be a point where your relationship won’t grow anymore because yall can’t be physically there for each other….but then hopefully by then you will be together again! Take this opportunity to be independent and just because you don’t talk every night doesn’t mean you don’t love each other. I made a point to keep busy so that I wouldn’t be sitting around thinking about what my significant other was doing. I made it through college…good luck! …flew home every 1.5 months…

By: Kendal

Kendal — Wed, 13 Oct 2010 15:25:01 +0000

Video Dates
I am three years into a long distance(2000+ miles) phase of a relationship and watching the same movie or TV show (Hulu, Netflix, etc…)while talking together and eating the same thing closes the distance.

By: Beowulf87

Beowulf87 — Wed, 13 Oct 2010 06:02:51 +0000

Joshua Harris! That’s the perfect recommendation for this young gentleman, IMO