Comments on: What Is Manliness?

By: Mathew Davydiuk

Mathew Davydiuk — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 17:07:59 +0000

Hi. I appreciate your thoughtfulness on the virtues of being a man. I appreciate your explanation about the maturation process. Definitely how I see it. I am wondering if your articles touch on violence perpetrated by men on women and children, and other men, this violence is largely a result of masculinity’s that are being taught to us everyday that go by unnoticed. Here is an example. Growing up I was told on a regular basis that I was a faggot/ gay if I shared my feelings, if i did anything out of the man norm, if I dressed differently……..often times this would follow with physical violence. Right now we have a crisis in masculinity. Have you read any jackson kats, I would love to see him on your list of books. Anyhow great site, i look forward to seeing it evolve. Id love to see more articles with critical analysis about masculinitiy. And I wouild love you not to change what your already doing…

By: Mac

Mac — Wed, 16 Jan 2013 20:46:16 +0000

As stated in a previous comment, the Boy Scout’s have a great guide. When I am feeling lost or confused in my life, choices or future, I repeat those traits and think through each one. In Scouts, we had a tendency to repeat them fast and harmoniously, like the alphabet; however, its important to take each one in kind and apply it.

By: Rob Dyson

Rob Dyson — Mon, 14 Jan 2013 19:42:21 +0000

What I don’t see commented about, but you seem to hold up as the most lacking in today’s culture, are these ‘rites of passage’. If it’s true that a lack of ‘calling out’ boys to be men though a rite of passage is a key component to our current failure, I’d like to learn more about it. Can it be done at any age? When would it be most appropriate? What kinds of forms would this take? How to do it without seeming corny? I, too, have been exposed to the Mens Fraternity material. I found it to be very good and there is a big emphasis there on rites of passage as well.

By: Henry

Henry — Mon, 14 Jan 2013 19:14:22 +0000

Brett, I was almost moved to tears reading this. This is what I’m talking about!

By: Travis Spires

Travis Spires — Mon, 24 Sep 2012 15:32:41 +0000

Morning, I have enjoyed this article greatly. I also like other comments on it. Sounds like I should have been put in scouting! I have one observation from childhood re: manliness or its lack. A friend had 1 sister. We were always pushed outside and left to our own devises, but the girl was taught how to run a house: make a grocery list, manage expenses. Long story short. Girls are tutored 1:1 from birth and boys are neglected. It’s like we are excluded from learning basic skills, so that we are subservient as adults and can never stand on our own. Because we aren’t taught.
Thanks T

By: Bill Frauhiger

Bill Frauhiger — Mon, 24 Sep 2012 15:07:06 +0000

Good points indeed, but I want to make you aware of a program that teaches men in depth what an authentic man is. It is found in a curriculum called Men’s Fraternity and we have a 4 prong, concise, and compelling definition of manhood.
A true man does these things:
1.) Reject Passivity
2.) Accept Responsibility
3.) Lead Courageously
4.) Expect God’s Greater Reward

By: Michael Dale Rogers

Michael Dale Rogers — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 16:22:55 +0000

First of all, the site wouldn’t allow me to register (error 404)
You’re making some good points about what a responsible PERSON should be but I so far haven’t found anything that DISTINGUISHES males from females.
Our culture is following the standard effect that mountains and much else does: Entropy — being ground to a lower level. Mountains are washed down as are the rigidities of our cultural structure.
The ‘rules’ of masculine and feminine are wearing away, not only are women now wearing what was in the past male attire, there is NOTHING a women can wear that will qualify as transvestitism, Attire traditionally only appropriate to the boxing ring is now pitched to women.
Men are also wearing jewelry, ear piercings and clothes similar to women’s. If one goes to Yahoo Groups, there are THOUSANDS of men either have or who wish to have breasts!
Hair length, a clear cue in the past now is no longer so, It is often unclear what the gender is of a person you see on the street~!
To get into the objective aspects, there are those that dress, and live as one gender yet have genitalia of the other.
That bastion of maleness the Garage or auto parts store is now often run by a woman!
All this leaves it unclear what are the determenates of gender.
For Me, if a person works on cars and has facial hair, they probably ARE maleFirst of all, the site wouldn’t allow me to register (error 404)
You’re making some good points about what a responsible PERSON should be but I so far haven’t found anything that DISTINGUISHES males from females.
Our culture is following the standard effect that mountains and much else does: Entropy — being ground to a lower level. Mountains are washed down as are the rigidities of our cultural structure.
The ‘rules’ of masculine and feminine are wearing away, not only are women now wearing what was in the past male attire, there is NOTHING a women can wear that will qualify as transvestitism, Attire traditionally only appropriate to the boxing ring is now pitched to women.
Men are also wearing jewelry, ear piercings and clothes similar to women’s. If one goes to Yahoo Groups, there are THOUSANDS of men either have or who wish to have breasts!
Hair length, a clear cue in the past now is no longer so, It is often unclear what the gender is of a person you see on the street~!
To get into the objective aspects, there are those that dress, and live as one gender yet have genitalia of the other.
That bastion of maleness the Garage or auto parts store is now often run by a woman!
All this leaves it unclear what are the determenates of gender.
For Me, if a person works on cars and has facial hair, they probably ARE maleFirst of all, the site wouldn’t allow me to register (error 404)
You’re making some good points about what a responsible PERSON should be but I so far haven’t found anything that DISTINGUISHES males from females.
Our culture is following the standard effect that mountains and much else does: Entropy — being ground to a lower level. Mountains are washed down as are the rigidities of our cultural structure.
The ‘rules’ of masculine and feminine are wearing away, not only are women now wearing what was in the past male attire, there is NOTHING a women can wear that will qualify as transvestitism, Attire traditionally only appropriate to the boxing ring is now pitched to women.
Men are also wearing jewelry, ear piercings and clothes similar to women’s. If one goes to Yahoo Groups, there are THOUSANDS of men either have or who wish to have breasts!
Hair length, a clear cue in the past now is no longer so, It is often unclear what the gender is of a person you see on the street~!
To get into the objective aspects, there are those that dress, and live as one gender yet have genitalia of the other.
That bastion of maleness the Garage or auto parts store is now often run by a woman!
All this leaves it unclear what are the determenates of gender.
For Me, if a person works on cars and has facial hair, they probably ARE maleFirst of all, the site wouldn’t allow me to register (error 404)
You’re making some good points about what a responsible PERSON should be but I so far haven’t found anything that DISTINGUISHES males from females.
Our culture is following the standard effect that mountains and much else does: Entropy — being ground to a lower level. Mountains are washed down as are the rigidities of our cultural structure.
The ‘rules’ of masculine and feminine are wearing away, not only are women now wearing what was in the past male attire, there is NOTHING a women can wear that will qualify as transvestitism, Attire traditionally only appropriate to the boxing ring is now pitched to women.
Men are also wearing jewelry, ear piercings and clothes similar to women’s. If one goes to Yahoo Groups, there are THOUSANDS of men either have or who wish to have breasts!
Hair length, a clear cue in the past now is no longer so, It is often unclear what the gender is of a person you see on the street~!
To get into the objective aspects, there are those that dress, and live as one gender yet have genitalia of the other.
That bastion of maleness the Garage or auto parts store is now often run by a woman!
All this leaves it unclear what are the determenates of gender.
For Me, if a person works on cars and has facial hair, they probably ARE maleFirst of all, the site wouldn’t allow me to register (error 404)
You’re making some good points about what a responsible PERSON should be but I so far haven’t found anything that DISTINGUISHES males from females.
Our culture is following the standard effect that mountains and much else does: Entropy — being ground to a lower level. Mountains are washed down as are the rigidities of our cultural structure.
The ‘rules’ of masculine and feminine are wearing away, not only are women now wearing what was in the past male attire, there is NOTHING a women can wear that will qualify as transvestitism, Attire traditionally only appropriate to the boxing ring is now pitched to women.
Men are also wearing jewelry, ear piercings and clothes similar to women’s. If one goes to Yahoo Groups, there are THOUSANDS of men either have or who wish to have breasts!
Hair length, a clear cue in the past now is no longer so, It is often unclear what the gender is of a person you see on the street~!
To get into the objective aspects, there are those that dress, and live as one gender yet have genitalia of the other.
That bastion of maleness the Garage or auto parts store is now often run by a woman!
All this leaves it unclear what are the determenates of gender.
For Me, if a person works on cars and has facial hair, they probably ARE maleFirst of all, the site wouldn’t allow me to register (error 404)
You’re making some good points about what a responsible PERSON should be but I so far haven’t found anything that DISTINGUISHES males from females.
Our culture is following the standard effect that mountains and much else does: Entropy — being ground to a lower level. Mountains are washed down as are the rigidities of our cultural structure.
The ‘rules’ of masculine and feminine are wearing away, not only are women now wearing what was in the past male attire, there is NOTHING a women can wear that will qualify as transvestitism, Attire traditionally only appropriate to the boxing ring is now pitched to women.
Men are also wearing jewelry, ear piercings and clothes similar to women’s. If one goes to Yahoo Groups, there are THOUSANDS of men either have or who wish to have breasts!
Hair length, a clear cue in the past now is no longer so, It is often unclear what the gender is of a person you see on the street~!
To get into the objective aspects, there are those that dress, and live as one gender yet have genitalia of the other.
That bastion of maleness the Garage or auto parts store is now often run by a woman!
All this leaves it unclear what are the determenates of gender.
For Me, if a person works on cars and has facial hair, they probably ARE male.
Michael Dale Rogers

By: Sampson

Sampson — Sun, 11 Jul 2010 19:05:26 +0000

@ mike – i fully agree with you until the point about JESUS… i don’t believe the religious aspect was as important to the epiphany as was the meeting with MEN… I’m not try to put down religion in any way… if thats what you believe, than more power to you, but to attribute something to Religion, when it in fact has nothing to do with religion…. I’m not down with that. “Thank GOD, we beat cancer” … or “Thank Medical Science, we beat cancer”??? Jesus left 2000 years ago and hasn’t come back since… he doesnt want to be here, lets not drag him up for every little thing ….

By: Ian MacManus

Ian MacManus — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 19:08:14 +0000

Confirmed Coward has a point. I want my sons to be Men who DO- not Guys who Have.

By: JG Lenhart

JG Lenhart — Tue, 29 Jun 2010 11:33:18 +0000

This is a good start but doesn’t really get to the “bottom-rung” understanding. If you are interested in going one more step, check out this post: http://modeletics.blogspot.com/2009/08/definition-of-real-man.html

The difference between men and women that you were searching for and didn’t attain is that men OUGHT to be focused on causes, while women OUGHT to be focused on effects. However, men are naturally focused on effects, while women are naturally focused on causes. EVERYTIME a man is destructive, it is because he is focused on an effect instead of a cause. Proverbs 31 gives the description of the ideal WOMAN…and it is ALL Profitable effects…it is ALL creation. Here is that link: http://modeletics.blogspot.com/2009/08/women-are-more-excellent-proof-9.html

I am teaching these definitions to males and females of all ages. When a sub-25 year old female hears these definitions, they instantly make sense and she realizes how much she needs and desires a man. The males on the other hand have a more difficult time because our culture has an “all authority and no responsibility” definition for “man” that is hard for most males to reject. However, once they understand this definition, they themselves know they are still a boy and actively look to do the work to become a man.

If you are TRULY interested in making a sustainable difference that is apparent to all, you will check out the links.