One of my favorite novels is Siddhartha by Herman Hesse. The message that stuck with me the most from the novel is the futility of following any leader, even if they are seemingly right. Listening to someone who understands is not the same actually understanding, which ought to be the aim. At the same time ignoring people who are right because you want to be “independent” is just as wrong.

I think the lesson to be gained from great men is not what they did, but the reasons they had for doing it.

The image at the header is striking: a young, black biker – during an era in which this would not have necessarily conformed to social norms: neatly dressed, who is smoking. He is obviously going about his business, just doing what he enjoys. Iconoclastic.

What adds to the charm of this photo is that a wedding band adorns his left ring finger, so he is enjoying a sense of freedom whilst it may be assumed he has not shirked the responsibility of marriage.

As a happily married, tattooed biker, with 47 cm biceps, working as a scientist, I embrace what others may perceive as opposite spheres of being. My point is this:

Do what you love, and harm none.

Thank you to all the commentors for making this a constructive and positively influenced site.

It’s funny when I think back to how I found this site — Disappointed by my observations of the state of man today, I sought to create a site like this, and thought I should do a few quick searches to see what similar offerings are already out there. Well I’ve been wholly impressed with what I’ve found here — so much so that I don’t see a need to dedicate a significant part of my time and energy to something similar. Just keep it up. You’re doing a fantastic service for the small percentage of men who will embrace the principles of your very well-written articles.

Be yourself. If your friends are complaining, they’re not your friends anyway. A woman may go after so called “men”–who can’t tie a tie, can’t wear a suit and aren’t qualified to clean a toilet for a living, but that is only because they have low self esteem and don’t think they deserve a real man. People who won’t accept you for who you are aren’t worth your time.

Stand up for yourself. I used to be an extreme doormat. In fact, I was the dirt beneath the doormat–or the dirt beneath that dirt. I used to play the nice guy because I constantly seeked approval and affection of those around me. It took some time, but I have realized that people don’t want to befriend someone who they can walk all over or who will take all the crap that comes their way. You can’t be afraid to say no. You don’t need to please everyone, and if you want to be a leader, you will one day have to say no — even if it means making enemies.

Don’t be afraid of what you don’t need to be afraid of. We tend to be afraid of things when there is no need to be afraid. I used to play it safe because I was afraid of what would happen if I took action. However, the consequences of not taking action are always greater. I realize now that we are all equal–no matter how much money you have, how physically strong you are or how beautiful you are–we are all human and there is no need for me to be intimidated–or scared by another human being.

Leave the past where it belongs. I used to be consumed by the past. “I wish I had done this…” “If only I had done that…” “Its all his faullt” etc… I can’t change the past, but I can learn from it. You have to take the positive lessons with you and keep looking forward. Being angry about something that has already happened and you can’t change is pointless and a waste of energy. If you can’t do anything about it, don’t worry about it. Just let it go and move on.

Sorry to go on like that, but that’s what I got from the article. Keep up the good work. I wish there was a publication to give the establishment a run for its money.