Comments on: Is Being A Stay-At-Home Dad Manly?

By: Jordan

Jordan — Wed, 30 Jan 2013 04:02:53 +0000

Short answer; Yes, it is very manly. As stated by Jim it is very manly and shows such traits as humility; responsibility; being a good father and being a good fiance.

I think the mix up with this series is manliness vs masculinity. A lot of these things are masculine or tough (not necessarily in a good way though ) or if you would, not a feminine act. I.e. is it manly to swear? No but it is masculine.

Most of these discussions border on mistaking manliness/being a gentleman for masculinity.

By: GL

GL — Sat, 12 Jan 2013 17:56:54 +0000

It is not “manly” to stay at home cooking, cleaning and changing diapers while your woman goes out to work. Nor is it manly to utter things like Baaahahahah.

By: JM

JM — Wed, 09 Jan 2013 01:57:16 +0000

I’d just like to say, as a man who has served in the military, worked construction and several and very different jobs in several fields that manlieness comes from the man. I quit the rat race about 5 years ago to start my own entertainment company and work for myself while my then fiancee continued to work as a teacher. She always made more than I did and this had no effect on our relationship then, and still does not bother us now. I make decent money with my gigs but they are not always consistant. The things that are consistant however, are: her paychecks allow me to enbsure our bills are always paid on time and something is being saved every month, the general cleanlieness and order in our home is never overlooked, the chores are always done before she comes home and our toddler has better care than you would ever be able to pay for at a preschool. THEN I make dinner and go out to my gigs to make whatever money I can by doing what I love to do. That income then will supplement hers and we are living pretty comfortably with all the things we don’t really need but are nice to have. These things (at least in the eyes of my wife) make me manlier than most men because I know how to have humility and humble myself to get the household things done. In return, I get the satisfaction of working for myself at my dream job, spending the formative developmental years of my daughter’s life teaching her the way we would like her to be taught AND reaping the many rewards of a wife who, aside from her job, has absolutely NOTHING to stress about when she is home, and let me tell you, that is really the only reason we are so concerned with being manly, right? to attract our mates and not look like sissies? REAL MEN know how to vuccum and sew and cook and raise a child. Looking tough is usually just a front for insecure weenies with little peckers.

By: He man

He man — Mon, 17 Dec 2012 21:39:35 +0000

Someone is gonna frown at a SAHD? Baaahahahah so the F what? Nothing wrong with staying home and caring for everything else while the lady brings home the bacon. My fiancé an I just started this out a few months ago, and our relationship has never been less stress free, she has no worries outside of the few hours she goes to work. From house to car maintenance cooking cleaning all that shhhut is cared for. All our situations are just too unique to have an accurate answer cause at the same time, I know deuches that are just worthless. I’ve worked my whole life since I was 16 so it’s taking a bit to get used to but whatever, I’m 30 now, and I just act like I’m still at a work schedule, she works, I work, she’s off, I’m off. She has her degree in nursing so it just made more sense in a lot Of ways.

By: Anthony

Anthony — Mon, 17 Dec 2012 04:18:35 +0000

I stay at home with my daughter during the day, and I love it. Its really nice to get so much time with her and to see her grow. At night I go to work. I work 12 hour shifts so i have half the week off. It provides me lots of time to do both.

By: Deborah

Deborah — Tue, 20 Nov 2012 22:23:08 +0000

Yes, I agree to a woman there is nothing ore manly then watching her husband taking care of their children. I read somewhere being a man means attending tea parties. For the simple matter that they are their being involved in the raising and upbringing process is truly important and vital to the kids themselves. I believe that the mother should not just focus on her job and leave the husband to handle it all but help as well. So you are co-parenting. If it is possible unless of course you a single dad of course then that makes it harder.

By: Brandon Hamilton

Brandon Hamilton — Thu, 08 Nov 2012 16:30:16 +0000

I’m obviously pretty late to this converstaion, but as a Stay at Home Dad felt like posting anyway.

When my wife was offered an excellent paying job, we discussed options and decided that I would stay home with our daughter and work parttime in the evenings for supplemental income.

Since then we have been blessed with twin boys, quite manly I feel, NAyway I always wondered how it be accepted living in a small town with an older population.

I have been stopped by multiple men, mostly older guys with grown up kids. At first I thought I would be reprimanded about being lazy and get a damn job. But all of these men, mostly very manly, war vets and stuff like that, have encouraged me and said its great to see a Dad with his kids. Some of them even having a bit of regret for not spending more time with their own kids, their words not mine.

Children need strong role models, male and female, Dads, you need to spend whatever time you can with your kids. Ensuring your children have a childhood where they learn to grow up to be educated, well-rounded, caring, strong adults, well, thats probably the manliest thing you can do as a father. Whether that means you work and provide the income for your family or stay home and teach them values and skills from home. Do what you have to do to create the future generation

By: Zack

Zack — Tue, 30 Oct 2012 16:00:50 +0000

Being a stay at home dad is despicable. One may as well stick one’s penis between one’s legs and wear a tutu.

By: deadcat42

deadcat42 — Sun, 28 Oct 2012 19:50:44 +0000

I see this conversation is 4 years and 4 months old, but I just found this awesome website and this conversation. I also just happened to find it on a Sunday morning when I’m solo Daddy-ing. How appropriate! I have a 4 year old son and a 4 month old daughter, I’m an AGR (active guard reserve) for a National Guard unit. I do Army stuff all week and when my wife, who is a gigging musician and private educator and a “stay-at home-mom,” goes to work on the weekends, it’s all me. I thought about this a lot while walking with the little girl in the stroller and my boy riding his bike in front of me. It all comes down to what you define as “manly” I guess. I had 10 days of paternity leave when my daughter was born last July, I took my son to some sort of event or to a park or something every day. I imagine that’s what I would do if I were a SAHD. I got home and put the boy down for a nap and turned on Metallica and washed the dishes one-handed while holding my infant daughter in the other. I hope that’s somewhat manly… I did not however, look at the most fashionable sewing patterns or knitting patterns. I didn’t cook lunch in the crockpot, I cooked it on my gas bbq (in the rain! Hell Yeah!)

I have a friend in my unit who’s a full time SAHD, during his days, he brews beer (he has a 12% icebock that he just finished and I have an awesome headache from it right now), he also writes and arranges music professionally, and gigs at nights when his “sugar-momma” gets home from her job. Pretty manly I think. Music is a tough industry.

There are some examples of what I would consider manly full time parenting. Now the question is what’s UN-manly parenting? Does that mean it’s effeminate or that it’s ineffective?! I would argue ineffective stay at home Daddying would include spending your time on yourself and not on doing the job (video games, time on Facebook, watching tv all day…). Effeminate stay at home Daddying would probably include sewing patterns, crock pots (I don’t ACTUALLY think that’s effeminate, but my wife uses a crockpot, I bbq, just different choices), knitting, and pantyhose. If that’s you’re bag Daddy-O, go right ahead, it’s better than ineffective parenting!

I’m still looking for what this website defines as “manly.” I keep getting distracted by other cool articles!

By: Adam K.

Adam K. — Thu, 27 Sep 2012 06:29:23 +0000

I work part time, but the bulk of my time is spent caring for my two children at home. To be honest, I am kind of on the fence on this one. On the one hand, I think being a stay-at-home dad is ultra-manly. As a father, you are absolutely on the front lines of your children’s lives. You are in an ideal position to show your daughters how a true gentleman treats a lady. You also have maximum contact with your sons to teach them to been kind-yet-tough studs.
On the other hand, I have to admit that I, myself, wrestle with not being “out there” maximizing my potential and being, um, manly.
I would say that there are two paths. The one is for the man to say, “Well, I guess I have to do this. Might as well hang up my Y chromosomes.” THAT is not manly. The other path is to say, “I, yes I, will raise the next generation of my family to be strong, respectful, compassionate, and excellent. And my actions will have a lasting impact on my family name for generations.” That IS VERY manly. Just be prepared to sip some strong scotch or smoke a pipe or chop some wood or make passionate love to your wife at the end of the day to make sure those Y chormosomes stay awake.