Comments on: Stop Hanging Out With Women and Start Dating Them

By: Ben_1982

Ben_1982 — Sat, 18 May 2013 19:38:24 +0000

’4: men today are wussies’ : Guys no you’re not. You’re awesome. The insanely enormous/unfeasible criteria the modern woman has of what the ‘perfect man’ should be today is not your fault. Remember that.

By: George

George — Wed, 15 May 2013 17:36:14 +0000

Completely wrong Vin. The key to dating, and to know whether or not there IS a relationship, something special, and the signal for marriage, is when there are all the things working, without sex and sex in the way of things. That’s how you see if you have love, a real relationship and a future together aka marriage.

By: Emily

Emily — Mon, 13 May 2013 17:42:59 +0000

I love this website, and I love this article.

By: Marky

Marky — Thu, 09 May 2013 22:44:10 +0000

I don’t distrust women, I don’t fear rejection, I don’t fear women, I’m just happy single. I don’t need a partner to make my life complete and I’m not any less of a man because I have no interest in having kids.

By: Kina

Kina — Thu, 09 May 2013 19:44:54 +0000

To those of you who say you keep asking girls and getting rejected, or to anyone with autism or anything else socially damaging, I would just like to say “keep trying, don’t give up”. I understand how stupid that sounds but if you think about it, the odds are the more girls you ask the more likely it is that someone will say yes. Because there are billions of people in this world, there really is someone for everyone, you might just have to look a little harder than other people, so try not to let the rejection bother you.

By: dave

dave — Tue, 07 May 2013 15:42:14 +0000

Mr. Rob Roy – Thanks for posting! It sounds like you are further along than a LOT of guys because you at least make contact with a female once in a while.
I hope that you can make some female friends ( as you had mentioned joining come “coed” group)
so that you can talk to one once in a while, about anything under the sun.
If you view this as an impossible,
complicated “game”, you are not going to want to play. Good luck!

By: Rob Roy

Rob Roy — Mon, 06 May 2013 09:32:16 +0000

Something went very wrong but I don’t know what or how.

Everyone is telling me they cannot understand why I don’t date women or haven’t got a girlfriend for 5 years. The fact is I don’t know either.

I have that personal “pool”-theory. Most couples meet within a group, no matter it’s a friendship group, a club or sports group or something else. You don’t meet your future wife on a market or in the subway by a funny joke like comedy shows pretend (there are exceptions of course, but ask around: most couple have known each other a small or long time before). So the “pool” of women I could date is very limited since I’m not attracted to those I’m already knowing (ok, there is one girl, but she’s got a boyfriend already).

Of course I tried to speak to women on the “streets” (e.g. the same woman selling me my buns in the morning) and tried asking her out for a coffee. At first they approves and seem delighted only to let me know a day or a couple of hours before they cannot. It happens all the time. They promise and cancel the date right before. Sometimes with an short message by phone. I mean, what is wrong with those woman? (and I know they just don’t want to and there is no real excuse since they do not propose another time/day or even get back.)

There is one girl I asked twice, different weeks, for cinema. She always replied it’s not that convenient today and we should try it next week. Well, I did try it an she refused me the second time. I don’t ask thrice. I think that she’s just being nice and don’t want to hurt any feelings by saying “I don’t want to go with you to the cinema” not knowing that this is even worse. I don’t like “subtext” or indirect talking. If she would have wanted to go out with me she would have asked (I know men should ask, but how often? I think twice is enough to find out if she’s interessted or not).

And that’s what happens all the time. As I mentioned earlier my male and female friends don’t know why because they say I’m smart, funny and attractive and well-dressed. But it won’t do any good, obviously.

Remembering the time my dad and grandpa told me about it seems it had been easier back then. Being a gentleman, a decent joke every now and than, endurance and a classy dance could make your beloved one your future wife.

Today it seems you’re just a friend or someone not worthy to date by being a gentleman (which tought me my parents all the time, I cannot simply give up on that). Don’t giving up on your crush annoy her and makes you even more unattractive to them. It seems dating gets a more and more complicated GAME.

It is just impossible with women agreeing in the first place and canceling a few hours or days.

By: Oldguy

Oldguy — Sun, 05 May 2013 15:27:00 +0000

Hi.
The dating game is the best way to go.
Hanging out in groups is fun but that is not who you’re going to tie up with if you plan to eventually start a family. Also, in my opinion people behave differently when in groups than they do when in a one on one situation.
Fear of rejection is what a lot of us males suffer but you have to make your move if you want to attract the girl you have your eye on. Like my mother used to say when I was a young man, “Faint heart never won Fair Lady” and that is true. Also the sooner you attempt a date the better. Otherwise you may begin to fanticize about the girl and mentally build her into something she may not be able to live up to. ( I made that mistake once). If you’re attracted, then do something about it.
I remember the best put down I ever had was when I was attracted to a girl and asked her to dinner. Her reply was that she would have really liked to but unfortunately she had a jealous boyfriend who would object. I looked at her shrugged and said “oh well, I tried”, along with a grin. She grinned back and said “Good for you, no harm in trying” I have also had some nasty put downs. I figured that was good because I found out early enough to not waste my time and money. Then I’ve had where my date was accepted and I was played like a fish for the next few dates, until I wised up and slipped away to lick my wounds.
It was during a period when I eally was not looking for anycommittment that I asked a girl out on a date because I liked her and wanted to get to know her better. There was no expectations on either side. In fact neither of us was looking for nor wanted a relationship. After more enjoyable dates we got to the point that not being together was not as much fun as when we were together. We have now been married 30 years and still dating :-) .
We still go on a date once a week like we did when courting.
This would not have happened had I been a shrinking violet. And the same can be said for her. She accepted even though she was not looking for a committed relationships. She just wanted to get to know me better in a one on one.
And , no we did not have a one-night stand. We did not (nor want to) get intimate for a while.

By: dave

dave — Sun, 05 May 2013 15:19:52 +0000

I realize that it is illegal to disagree with women and to actually question their intentions, but maybe, just maybe, the “beautiful”,”charming” and “smart” women you described, who want guys to ask them out (instead of them ,oh my gosh,asking men out), are not so beautiful,smart and charming as they think they are.

By: Will

Will — Sun, 05 May 2013 09:47:59 +0000

It’s more of a lack of confidence if a man has to work himself out to “prove himself” to a woman. Can he not stand on his own? Never fall into the trap of women trying to get you to do things for them to seek their favor. Be your own man in your own power, and you can be sure that your actions may romanticize some woman to action.